Life's a BUSH of roses

Inspiring songs...

2010-04-24T16:13:00.001+08:00

Sometimes, inspiration comes from God in ways I always least expected. Though it should not catch me by surprise cause I should be expecting it,yet it still amazes me how much He has NEVER given up hope on me..

My dear housemates Priscilla and Christy bought me a Casting Crowns for my birthday. Never heard of the band before but Prics says that it is a must listen.

And I agree...

Listening to the songs felt like He was telling me something. It felt likt God was talking to me,finally.After all these years of asking and begging to hear Him, He talks to me though a band i have never heard of and I believe,by His timely planning, Priscilla and Christy to introduce to me..

Thanks girls!!I love you crazily too!!!

Of the whole songs in that album,I found my inspiration to push though this tough phase of life in this one song that brought tears that is not tears that can be seen,but the tears that cannot be seen...

May this song bring some divine inspiration to you whose reading this..and if more, the unseen tears :)

Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wandering heart.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again.
Who am I?
That the voice that calmed the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.

Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
I am yours..
I am yours..

Here's how the song goes...

Loves...

Pics from ze annual income collection festival :)

2010-02-16T14:29:00.004+08:00

Ze grand family pic :)

Missing the puchi brother of mine who's all the way in UK..

sniff sniff...

It is always a tradition to take a pic of the offsprings-offsprings..

Again,lacking the tower of the family..sigh..

The spousies of the 1st gen offsprings..

Unfortunately there is no available photos of the 2nd gen offsprings spousies..

CAUSE THERE ISN'T ANY YET!!

*evil laugh*

The proud parent with their offsprings..

All sporting prosperous bellies..Hehe..

And my proudest work ever which is currently the desktop backdrop of my grandp's computer..

*beams*

And more pics to come if only my comp will stop dying on me..

Accidentally deleted a driver when my sis bf and I deleted the virus vault. Now my comp is going crazy thus I am undergoing as it is currently, the excruciating pain and torture of having to download the entire driver section cause dear clever me left all my disc in Seremban which is currently collecting dusts and dropped paints from the painter who is painting the house..Sigh.

How my great mind works at times still never cease to amaze me...

And my lack of good relationship with the IT world which just seems to elude me all the time cause I think it secretly despises me..Not my fault,I tried..

I tend to rantle too much I know..

Thats why you have to have a STRONG ear to be around me...

Yet another collage...and certain train of thoughts.

2010-01-17T11:29:00.000+08:00

Yes, in the midst of my boredom and fascination for Photoscape, I have produced ANOTHER collage of me family :)

Still in need to hunt down more pictures. Need a camera and another harddrive now.My current 300Gig harddrive is FULL!!!

Too many songs inside and movies that I cant bring myself to delete (I think I'm the virtual junkie keeper person..hehe)

Reports,reports and MORE REPORTS again..

Sign,it seems like all clinical school is about it reports, clerking and trying to catch interesting patients to learn as much as you can.

Involves a lot of time management, which is not really my area cause I tend to do things when and where I feel like it.

Sniff,sniff...

~.~.~.~.~.~.~

I realized that sometimes in life, I tend to really take things for granted.

I grumble about the little petite things in my life.

Why my lecturers are always picking on me (I still do not believe I have this HUGE NEON sign on my head that says 'Victimize me' )

Why I have so much of reports to finish all the time..

Why I just don't have the time to do the things I want..

Why Why and more Why Me's..

It sounds so selfish of me.It felt like all I cared about was I, ME ,MYSELF.

All I could see was poor lil ME and all the misfortunes that comes with being born as ME.

Until I walked into the Hugh Density Unit last week to see a patient.

No,lets not call her a patient. Let me call her a friend.

Her name is Elizabeth. She was born with scoliosis.(Click on it if you do not know what that is). She never asked to be born with it.The consequence of having this condition is endless and life is like a thin piece of thread for her that could break any moment.

Or like a candle exposed to the harsh winds but is blocked by a sheet of paper.

So fragile.

Yet, despite all her hardship,she endured.

She did not grumble about her condition, she accepted it from a young age that she was different.Occasionally she would cry about it but she still kept her spirits high.

And high did her spirits go that she endured all the way till university.

Until she came back for the holidays and was infected with a lung infection. A reminder again that with her condition, any form of infection of injury is HIGHLY dangerous. She had to be admitted to HDU and was intubated from her trachea at first but because of her abnormal size and curvature of her airways, the staff could not find a suitable tube to intubate her with. So she was intubated orally.

Now, intubation is not a fun thing to endure.You cant talk, cant eat, cant drink and cant even swallow your own saliva.Its a horrible experience, one I hope I'l never endure.

She fought to keep her spirits up. Whatever hope she had she clung on to it for dear life.

But there is so much your spirit can cling to.

She slowly slipped into depression, she hated the tube,hated being stuck on bed all day with multiple weird machines beeping around her.

She got lonely at night when there was no one around.

Her condition slowly deteriorated.

I could see her fighting to live,she really wanted out. But the reality was hitting hard against her door that it was slowly sticking its foot in and eventually its wholeself.

Everyday when I went to see her,I could feel my heart crying out for her, for a miracle,any miracle.

Anyone who saw her would feel the same.

She would try to cheerfully greet me when she saw me.But I could still see the pain in her eyes. She would always want to hold my hand as I stand by her bed and talk to her. And she would always point to her tube and ask for it to be removed but because I have no authority, I can only shake my head and say sorry. And her tears will flow.

Last Friday, I found her alone.She was finally off the tube but on the mask which she found uncomfortable as the air blowing through the mask was noisy. Her eyes lighted up when she saw me. She was too weak to beckon me over but she had the strength to hold my hand again. She told me she was only having the mask on until 11am. Then she wouldn't know what happens after.

As I stood there holding her hand, I could not help but marvel and her fragile yet enduring strength. I said a silent prayer for her. That she will see through this. The doctor came to see her and told her she needed the mask for a day. She begged the doctor to have it removed but the doctor did not want to give up on her.

When the doctors left,I too wanted to leave. But she clung on to my hand and looked at me with pleading eyes.

I could see her mouthing the words 'Stay with me'.

And I nearly broke down.

I stayed with her until her parents came and quietly took my leave after saying Hi to her parents.

What a way to be given a reality check.

Her condition has been improving really slowly but surely.She almost gave up hope a few times,had to be resuscitated. But she pulled through.

And I know she will pull through right till the end.

She has a fighter spirit in her although at times, she does have her doubts.

Please keep her in prayers.

How small my groans and whines seem when compared to her.

How small I feel, when I have everything I could asked for when compared to her.

I have to learn to be more grateful for everything I am and everything I have.

For now,I will continue to visit her everyday I'm there until she is discharged to remind myself life's not about me..

Its not about my petite complains.

Its SO MUCH MORE than that...

Its been awhile

2010-01-09T16:43:00.002+08:00

Yea yea...

I know its been A LONG while since I've written anything.

Writers block..

Then had a huge infulx of inspiration on what to blog bout..But lazy to type cause it was ALOT!

So instead of blogging,let me show you something I did while I was bored and feeling uninspired to study..

Took me half an hour to play with it but hey,I LOVE IT!!

Part 1 of the People in my life :)

Most of the people I love..

and their faces immortalized here..

I love you people!!

And there is definitely more to come but I realized I'm lacking alot of things..

The most important being PICTURES!!!

Hence,I'm in need to hunt down all the pics from those who owe me and those who don't but I still want to steal..hehe..

And that is only 1 part of it...

Think I am in great need of a camera now.

Need to capture the moments of my life while it slowly slips away.

Want to remember the moments with everyone..

Who knows I might have Alzheimer's one day and the only way to preserve the memory is by capturing it in pictures :)

Then there is also the time to put it up nicely..

Haha,the laziness is kicking in again..

Inspiration from 'above'

2009-10-25T15:24:00.000+08:00

I've been having this piece of paper stuck on my board in my home since I can remember when.

I usually tend to ignore it until I find myself stuck to my chair as exams draw near and for a break,I just happen to look up and see that piece of paper that inspires me to push on..
And remind me that in everything I do..
I'm not alone..

I know most of us are facing hard times during the upcoming exams,as it is our first exam in clinical school so we are not so familiar to the system.To others, they are facing their biggest exams yet.

So,I'm hoping that after u read this,u'l feel just as inspired as I am to push on.
And remember that in everything we do,We're Not Alone.

His Watching Over Us :)

I am to blessed to be stressed!!!!

The shortest distance between a problem and a solution,

Is the distance between your knees and the floor.

Those who kneel to the Lord can stand up to ANYTHING

So yea,during exam period time you'l prob see me limping around complaining of knee pains.
Its that symdrome priest get coz they kneel down to much..
Dang,can't remember the word for it..

So to me friends who are facing exams and stressing out..
All the best!!
And to my bodoh-clan,lets just keep remaining bodoh..
Lol,just kidding!!

Of scales and more nonsensical reports

2009-10-19T20:17:00.000+08:00

Reports...

Reports...

Reports...

And More Reports..

Why did God create REPORTS!!!

Why do we have to type SO MANY REPORTS!!

Wasting paper and killing more trees only...

I wonder if the hantu that came up with this idea of writing THIS MANY reports is related to the owner of the A4 paper company or something...

Next monday holiday...

YESH!! CANT WAIT!!!

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Eversince I started Int Med posting, I meet patients who are constantly in pain and I find myself having to ask them this favourite question everytime.

Me : So,on the scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being pain that u can bear and 10 being unbearable pain that death seems so much sweeter (Ok,maybe i didn't say it that way but it still has death being so much better than the pain), how would u rate your pain?

On one occasion, a friend of mine asked that question to a patient who said he was in so much pain that is was so unbearable and this was what happened..

Sky's Friend : So uncle, on the scale of 1 to 10,what you rate your pain? 1 is boleh tahan pain and 10 is pain until want to die (direct translations k)

Patient : 1

And since we are on the subject of scales..
I was feeeling really depressed the other day cause I just finished my mini -CEX (its not pronounced SEX although it seems like that) and the feedback I got was I need to study more.It was not just from the lecturer (Thanks Dr Koh,you were really nice. You ROCK!! => OK,if your reading this,you did not see that statement yeah Dr. I'l bring a yellow bag for you incase I see u and if u ask me question and my answer makes u want to 'vomit blood'. Since the dustbin I pointed to is not the right place to vomit in..Hehe.. ) but it also came from following doctors for rounds and when they bombard me with questions, half the time I stand there stumped and admittingly telling them the much dreaded words most people don't like to hear.

"I'm sorry but I don't know."

Although its an honest answer,I cant help feeling so stoopid and how low it makes me feel to tell them I don't know.Sometimes I wonder if i'm studying right.I read alot but when questions are thrown at me,my brain feels like its been dipped in Nitrogen solution or suddenly the flow of electrical impulses all stop to the simultaneous Red light.And truth to be told,its affecting my morale and confidence in this field even more.

I want to do what I'm doing now.I want to do medicine cause everyday is really exciting.The patients I meet and talk to, the new things I see that most people would never believe is possible.

But,am I good enough?

Am I really prepared?

My sister told me one of her friend who was suppose to be doing housemanship has quit.Mum,jie and I were talking about it over the dinner table.We felt it was strange and such a waste.But what I took away from that table troubled me more and further pulmate my confidence.

What if I end up like Jie's friend?

What if I cant take the stress?

What if I make it all the way cause thats as much strength I have but the next 2 years in housemanship is the final straw for me?

I don't want to end up like Jie's friend.
I want to succeed.

And mum said something else that really struck a cord and now has me chewing on.

Studying is one thing in medicine,the stress is another thing.Everyone can study but not everyone can take the pressure.

And after all that pondering,I came up with this scale that's currently posted on my MSN pm.
Its call the stoopid scale.
Goes more or less along the same line as the pain scale : 1 being bearble stoopid,10 being REALLY TOTALLY INSANELY BEYOND DOUBT (and help) stupid..
Basically its asking people to rate how stoopid they think I am..

So...

On the scale of 1 to 10,How stoopid do u think I am?

2009-10-11T23:01:00.000+08:00

Honestly speaking..

I hate being the evil,mean person that'l make me really hate-able.

I prefer to stay out and just stay down,make peace...

(Think this influence came from watching all those movies like Black Hawk Down and Band of Brothers)

Why cause a commotion when there is always a more reasonable,rationale and less voice-raising way to settle things?

But of course,easier said than done..

Desperate times occasionally calls for desperate measures..

And sometimes,hoping to be nice is not an option.

Its a forceful way if I want to survive and not get trampled on.

Yes,just because I'm small sized and smile or laugh alot and play more than I should DOESN'T mean I'm what I look like on the outside.

It doesn't mean I can be easily taken advantage of.

Neither does it mean,I'l always give in with a smile.

I'm not an idiot,nor am I as docile as u see me..

I merely choose to not be that vicious mean beast that everyone has and openly show it.

But trample on me,or take advantage of me..

I'l make hell seem like heaven for you..

I still prefer to be nice and peaceful.

So please,don't provoke me....

One of the best love poems to read

2009-10-05T16:48:00.001+08:00

Got this wonderful love poem sent to my phone this morning that just really made my day :)

This poem was created through a series of sms-es

EK : OMG the sky is so dark..

ME : But its shining bright here..

Ek : Now its raining

Haha.

GOTCHA!!

Super randomness of the day.
If you didn't get the joke,its ok.Its an internal joke,your not slow.

And an extra note to add,I'm NOT ATTACHED!!And NO PRIS and CHRISTY!! I DO NOT WAN FLETCHER (or however you spell that idiot's name)
I'd rather take the scapel and slit my wrist than let him come near me or have anything to do with him...
Nono,i'm not advertising myself.
I'm pointing out that this was never actually a love poem.
ALthough it can sound like one..

And another internal joke to add for the day...

I Wonder Why??

*cheesy grinz*

Sky....

2009-10-04T17:39:00.001+08:00

Just heard her neighbour screamed and is wondering whats wrong..

And now is recalling CW-Ian-JM-Lippy's neighbour incident...

And is wondering now if should go check or do the Lippy thing..

And now is starting to panic cause she hasn't studied the entire weekend..

Needs to stop typing from a 3rd person's POV...

Misses her home and TV + Astro on a nice warm,lazy weekend afternoon like this...

Discovery of the day

2009-09-28T21:40:00.003+08:00

Who would have thought that you don't always have to have pure SALT in your kitchen to cook something good ?

Yup,I is not kidding.

Was too tired today to join my fellow housemates and extended housemate for dinner.Told them not to buy dinner for me in case I woke up really late and have no appetite to eat since I kinda screwed up my gastric rhythm.Unfortunately,since I'm a slight sleeper,once waken no more sleep for me.So after another 10 minutes of snoozing and unable to continue on,I decided to dig in the fridge for dinner and found :

1) One ready made ceaser salad purchased from Jusco (gotta love them,make life so much easier)
2) Mushrooms
3) Frozen solid chicken breast meat (took me half an hour to defrost it and ripping it apart)
4) NO SALT !!! (lolz )

So decided to whip up a ceaser salad minus the salt for the chicken grilling.Instead,after much digging in the kitchen,I found....

GROUNDED CHICKEN CUBES!! (i think this was from Liyen,or is it Jo's? But thanks anyway,quite a lifesaver)
Marinated the chicken breast with it plus some pepper and TADAA!!!!

Ceaser Salad with NO SALT!! :)
And mind u,the grilled chicken with chicken cube seasoning was AWESOME!!
Hehe....
Bet you did'nt know that rite?

Gonna experiment somemore in the kitchen when I'm more free..Lalala..
Sorry no pictures.Was too hungry to snap any.Evidence of it is well,something you wouldn't want to know or see *grinz*

I should start watching what I eat...I'm starting my slow crawl to THAT age *gasps*

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Was looking at Yeen's photos on FB of her Pub Crawl in Leichester when I crossed a picture of guys donning banana suits.
And now,I have this annoyingly hyper song stuck in my head...GRR!!!

Seriously ANNOYING me now!!

2009-09-26T21:51:00.001+08:00

It seems this famous saying's been passing round alot these days.
Is there a season for all this old proverbs thingy?

If life gives you lemons,make lemonade.

I say..
If life gives you lemon,take it,cut it in half and rub it back at the idiot's face who gave it to you :)

I'm feeling biatchy coz I'm having a very congested nose and running a fever...

Troubles and woes..

2009-09-26T10:13:00.000+08:00

So I is back in Seremban again..

Sad and depressing to come back...

Having attachments issues....

And I thought moving to Seremban was gonna be fun and exciting.

Not that it isn't but,I guess I'm still kinda attached to HOME.My KL Home,with my room and bed,and familiar halls,familiar streets.Despite the fact that its kinda empty at the moment.But still,its HOME...

And better part yet,I didn't come home alone.

Yup,I came back with a good old friend called Viral infection!NO its not H1N1,its just a throat infection. Think I contracted it when I was in KL.Now my throat hurts,and I mean REALLY hurts to the point I cant swallow even water properly or breathe coz it feels like someone poured kerosine down my throat and lighted it.Pharyngeal walls are nicely inflammed and itchy too.

Better part,from the sorethroat I'm now having a terrible blocked nose which makes it EVEN MORE impossible to breathe.

Me and my wonderfully dysfunctional body.

To add the cream on this wonderful cake,I have a mini evaluation on Monday with my mentor on how I clerk pateints.Brownie points to anyone who can tell me how I'm gonna communicate with them when I cant even open my mouth without screwing up my face in pain,and thats JUST opening my mouth.Don't ask how I look when I want to eat,drink or breathe deeply to compensate my blocked nose.

Sometimes,I feel like it really sucks having to be the 'evil' person.The mean person who has nothing nice coming out from his/her tougue.No one likes being that kind of person.But i feel like sometimes,its not a matter of choice but more of duty or the situation calls for it.And u know that by being mean,certain barriers will be broken and perceptions will change,and probably,consequences too.

I really don't want to be a mean person,really.I hate being mean.

But I think I have to now cause people are starting to step over my head and think I'm an idiot just cause I don't say anything when they do but silently hope that they'l not do it again. This is in HUGE regards to my landlord and his electrician who has done nothing but gave empty promises of coming to fix the house and the heater.Yes,we're still stuck with icy cold showers.The Raya week would have been perfect to get things done but I guess,even chinese and indians want to berRaya too.

How am I gonna talk to them if my throat is like this?

IN NEED OF MIRACLE!!!

Because I was bored and notty..

2009-09-24T12:43:00.002+08:00

Been trying to revamp this damn blog but lets face it,I know nuts bout revamping blogs and editting in nice stuffs to make it look better coz :

1) I don't have the time

2) I end up wanting to make things simple and uncomplicated

3) I just get lost with all those HTML language

Cute lil Chloe agreed to stay the night with me (NO,its not what you think!!)
So since she's quite a late sleeper,I'm now left to wait for her to wake up while she cutely sleeps on the spare bed in my room.Yes,she's THAT adorable even when she sleeps.So like a little life size doll you could squeeze the life out of..
Not that I want to squeeze the life out of u dear :)

Reminds me of the days when we slept over at YOUR house (Yes,you..u notty person who ran away from me to the otherside of the world and left me a 1 line piece of advice) and wake up late then head over to ur FAVOURITE cafe for branch.Hrm,since I'm kinda free today,maybe we shd make that trip over just so that it feels like ur still with us here laughing and gossiping away till the cows come home :P
I miss you girl!!!

I'm suppose to be typing my case summaries (yes,thy dreaded case summaries) after a GOOD LONG SLEEP!! *guilty*
But,guess what I'm typing now :) Don't need a no brainer to tell you that unless your one :P

Anyway,was playing with lil spoilt Rover when I saw my feet..

Seriously,it kinda freaked me out co it was the kind of feet we actually saw in medical books..
Kinda gross but pretty cool too..
Could poke and palpate them..

If ur getting grossed out,don't look...
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I'm warning you...
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Seriously...
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OK,don't say I didn't warn you...
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Feast your eyes on....

MY PROTRUDING VEINS!!!!

*evil laugh*
Yes,the result of long standing hours in the hospital has lead to this unsightly beauty :P
Cool rite?!

I can palpate my dorsalis pedis pulse with no effort at all..

And its freaking STRONG!!

Thank goodness it hasn't developed to this.....

Although I think it might one day..

Yipes!!

I hate....

2009-09-24T00:38:00.003+08:00

I'm gonna rant here alil so if ur not ready to hear me rant,bugger off!!

I'm not in a nice mood at the moment...

So sorry..

Right back to what I hate...

I HATE.......

1) Writing case summaries.WHY OH WHY DO WE NEED TO WRITE THOSE JUST BEATS THE CRAP OUT OF ME!!

2)Writing case presentation. What's the diff? One's longer than the other,one requires me to be more detail and precise and it takes up more of my time cause I'm stuck trying to figure out what to HECK to type for that damn report!

3)EVIL landlords who talk bullocks and think I'm THAT stoopid.Note to landlord,I WAS NOT BORN YESTERDAY!!

4)How my mouth runs away alot when my emotions runs TOO high. Need to clamp it shut more often. Need that damn Ipod!!

5) Having to come back from a good and relaxing holiday. Sucks coming back to reality eh?

6)Having to put down a good book just when I'm starting to get my mood back to reading. Finished Elizabeth Noble's - Things I want my daughters to know. Really good book and was really touched by it (not till I teared though). Just bought my new book, Diary of Anna Frank. To those who don't read much and are probably scratching your head wondering 'Who the heck's that?',she's the famous Jewish Teen who left a diary of her accounts when she and her family was in hiding from the Nazi's. Her diary touched the lives of millions and taught those who read it to appreciate the meaning of the word PEACE.
READ IT PPL!! ITS A DAMN GOOD BOOK!!!

7)Trying to make my list reach the perfect 10 but fail cause my list stops right here...

Sadly,as much as I hate it,I still have to face the evil,harsh cruel reality...

Hence, its back to them damn reports...

SIGH!!!

back from the dead

2009-09-13T16:51:00.003+08:00

I'm back from the dead.Seriously...
I've no line at my place so communication with the outside world was limited to those living in the same cemetery with me or within the neighbouring tombstones.Why i say that is because everyone somewhat looks like a zombie by the time 2nd week was over..Don't have to ask why,doesn take a genius to figure that part out.

So first question u'l probably be asking what has happened from the land of the dead?
Well,I'm pretty much surviving.Hence,the rebirth from the dead.Or the awakening or the reliving or...whatever you want to put it la.
Am back in KL for the weekend.This is afterall my last weekend end with the brother.Trying to spend quality time with him (but he has run off to see his friends.sheesh,so much for being a loving brother).But its alright.I'm gonna miss him alot afterthis.

Sigh,wondering if it was the right thing to send him off to the airport.
No more bullying,no more annoying me when his bored.Just no more lil annoying-yet-oversized-kid-brother anymore.Feels really sad when I think of how I'm growing apart from my siblings.Think i just joined the bandwagon with my parents on the Empty Nest Syndrome.Life is such a biatch when it comes to goodbyes.
Still pinning for that space continuem time trap..
Yes,thats the sexay brother and sister of mine with the un-sexay me :)

Next question would probably be how's life there?
Life there is fine.Housemates are so-so.Of course,its quite true what they say :You never know the true nature of a person until you live with them.
Hands down to that.
The funny characters that sufaces when u really sit down to observe them in the house really amazes me.How i could miss such things before this stumps me.I guess,maybe its also cause i'm so use to living in my own home where everything is how i'm so use to it being.Thank God so far,no problems arise yet.
Sans with the landlord of course.
The masked landlord!!
Enough said.
The house?
HELL!!!
Ok,i lied alil.The house is ok as well.Not the kind of dream house anyone would be proud to annouce they live in.Here's the break down of THE HOUSE.

1) Strategic location smacked in the middle of almost everything.Walking distance to uni (sans when u forget something after u reached uni and have to walk back to get it..such a killer but oh well,least i don't have to take more regular jogs since i'm already regularly walking) +1
2) Downstairs room is the BOMB! Hell yeah.Right next to the kitchen.And cause its the maid's room,its tiny and cosy enough for me and ONLY me.Plus point is getting the room beside to throw my clothes in and other unwanted junks.+2
3) Internet's up and running.Ok,thats only a recent event but i guess its still counted. +1
4) Ah liang's house is just 2 doors away.AWESOME!!!+1
5) Eating out's been pretty cheap I have to say.And the food's AWESOME!!! I'm so into banana leaf rice at the moment.lolz..+1

Total of plus points = 6

Now the Shiat part
1) House is FULL of SHIAT!!And i mean LIZARD shiat.Like,what the heck!!I thought the landlord said he was gonna clean the place.And the layers of dust is enough to coat a layer of cake! (this is why I am starting to feel alil annoyed with the landlord,no offence to my Indian friends but INDIANS! And his a lawyer.What a joke/combo) -2
2) If you though army camps or NS camps are bad,think again.The place is BREEDING mosquitoes.I'm talking by the ARMIES! If i could mind control this lil blood sucking monsters,I could dominate the world within the first week itself.Again,told the landlord to gas the place but till now..I'm waiting for the cows to come home too. -1
3) DO NOT get conned by the solar powered water heated.Seriously,ITS A SCAM!!Already been taking ICY COLD SHOWERS for 2 WHOLE WEEKS!!Also been telling that AhNey about it but what has he done? NIT ZIL NADA!!Goin on bout his techinician not here,need to fix this and that.WTH!!If someone tells u its not been working for a whole week non-stop,DO SOMETHING BOUT IT!!!I'm not bugging u cause I've nothing better to do.Its already bad enough I have asthma excarbated by cold,here I am taking COLD SHOWERS every freaking time!If i catch pneumonia or fall sick,AhNey's just met his last client!Already when I have to jump into the cold shower I've to psycho myself to 'SUCK IT IN!!' but there's a limit to how much i can take and the limit's about to meet.-3
4) Packed schedule's not making it any better.Internal is one killer I vouch for that.Non stop work from 8-5 pm.So different from the IMU BJ schedule where its 2 hours lectures,prob another 2 hours of CSU or PBL and ur free to kill yourself the rest of the day for choosing med only to have to do it again the next day.Now,I don't even think I have time to kill myself.Wait,don't even think i can even think bout it cause time's too precious to waste on thinking of such things at the moment. -1

So the total score : -7

Hence bringing the total score to...
A -1!!!

Don't get me wrong.Leaving in Seremban is great.But u just have to becareful with the type of ppl ur gonna stay with and the type of landlords ur gonna suck it up with the next 2 years.

Feeling homesick is pretty normal I guess.I've been away longer before from home but I guess the feeling is slightly different now.Least before this,I know I can still come home.But now,I'm not sure when I can come home.When I came home this weekend,I felt like I really understood the term 'Home Sweet Home' and 'There's no Place like Home'.The moment I stepped into the house,various feelings and thoughts just rushed through me.One of them being,I'm glad i'm home,but why do I feel alil like a stranger in my own home?That feeling was futher amplified when I walked into my room and saw my bed covered with a sheet like its not been in use for ages.It also felt weird when I woke up this morning not to the already familiar sight of my small store room (like Harry Potter) but to a room that I was starting to leave behind.
Then there's the thought of no longer coming home to my brother watchin TV or atleast shouting a greet when I walk through the door.Or see him bend over his computer in his room when I walk past it.

So much said,I think its time to hit the books alil then start packing for my journey back to the land of the dead.
Literally....

24 hour convenience stores?

2009-08-28T00:52:00.003+08:00

Sometimes,and this u have to agree with me,we wish we had more than just the usual 7/11 convenience store in terms of variety.
I'm not talking bout what they sell in 7/11.I'm not complaining there cause seriously,whoever came up with this business is really God Sent.
But I'm talking bout things that 7/11 don't sell.
Like yarns.Cause I'm in the midst of making something for my brother as his parting gift and i'm out of yarn.Its 1am in the morning and I'm rushing for time to finish it so,I'm really wishing now for a God Sent Convenient Store that sells things other than food and basic necessities.
Why couldn't there be a 24 hour Mall?I think its a pretty darn good business.
Think bout it,people who are busy during the waking hours and have no time to shop during the day can still go shopping at night after work and not rush to get the shopping done before the shops close at 10 pm.Or if you cant' slp and need to go somewhere to just jalan-jalan (and feel relatively safe than out on the streets with those thugs and gila ppl)..
Maybe I shd try this business if I ever make it big :P
Oh wait,bad idea,I'm not a business minded person.I'l probably get cheated within the first 24 hours of business and go bankrupt the following day..
Lolz..

Gah!!
Looks like I've to wait it out till a more appropriate time for the stores to open and then get my yarn.Till then I shall stare at my work and kick myself for not getting it earlier when I had the chance AND for doing nothing but stare at it when I could have finished half of it if I had my darn yarn..
Sigh..

Btw,Knitting's fun :)
Haha..

24 hour convenience stores?

2009-08-28T00:52:00.000+08:00

2009-08-23T23:33:00.002+08:00

One more week to go and I'm off down south,45 minutes away to the not-so-forsaken-town-called-Seremban.Half excited,half dreading it.
Can't wait to start anew there,staying out on my own with the housemates (God forbid we shall ever have probs in the house) and starting clinical :) *jump jump*
CAN WAIT,to letting my bed-hubby go (I really feel like dismantling it and reassembling it in Seremban but I'l have to repeat that tedious process every weekend when I come back to KL.
CAN WAIT,to stay home and eat more of mum's food.I'm lazy to cook and if i cant get any lazier,I can actually go on an empty stomach until someone offers to buy food for me..or until my stomach sings to a frequency of 120 Hertz.Hoping the former comes first though *grinz*
CAN WAIT,to leave the comforting scene of my room that I've grown into and REALLY rooted myself into.
CAN WAIT,to leave Astro behind before having to stick to papers of medical notes and anything NOT related to the medical world,sans House M.D.

I think if I had a choice,I'l uproot my entire house and bring it along with me to Seremban.I think I'm too attached to this familiar surroundings I call HOME.
~Home is where the heart is~

Life is starting to be quite a biatch.Waiting for the seniors to move out and for the landlord to faster fix the house so that I can throw my stuffs into my room and make list of things I need to buy.Going back to Kuantan again this weekend coz STOOPID HOD's in Kuantan GH froze all the HO's leaves until further notice due to H1N1.Wonder who's fault is it that the cases are starting to rise rampantly.As to the HOD,I'm trying to see from a positive POV why they are such a bunch of brainless ticks with the most ridiculous set of rules ever imaginable.
Evidently,I'm failing miserably at that and am now wishing,like the rest of the HO's there,for them to either trip down the staircase and get a severe head injury or an alien aducts them and after rewiring their off-centered-grey-white-matter,they'l be somewhat nicer and more reasonable and hopefully,more humane than what they falsely portray now.Makes u really wonder if the older some doctors get,the lower their brains sink out of their heads and into their gluteals.Lets blame it on GRAVITY so that the world can be happy:)
Back to the landlord and the seniors currently habitating the house I'm renting,I am seriously praying now that the landlord doens't call me on the 31st to tell me I can move in.Starting to regret taking a house with seniors currently occupying it and having exams so near to the date others want to move into.

Now that its coming to the end of the month,feels kinda sad so many ppl are flying off.
*cries*
I hate having to say GoodBye's and parting ways.It really just places a black dot in my story.I wished,many a times,that time will always continue on this loop frame,where time stops but we don't and we're stuck in this time loop.No goodbyes :)
Harapan Gemuk!!
Worst yet,my lil brother is leaving too...
*Cries a river*
I'm gonna miss that lil-huge monster that has always tormented my life.How we have grown from fighting over toys to space to when-we-are-bored-and-have-nothing-todo-but-annoy-each-other-till-mum-comes-and-gives-her-FGS.

Dang photoshop is not working!!GAH!!
Cant edit my photos to blog...*stabs photoshop*

Lazy to update further..
My tummy is starting to fold...
GASP!!!
Must start jogging again...

Of make ups and creating 'Good impressions'

2009-08-01T23:15:00.006+08:00

Ever gotten that deje vu feeling when someone tells u something and u swore u heard it before somewhere somehow but cat put ur finger on it?

I got another deja vu,this time coming from me own boss!!
Happened last friday while i was busy at work.A friend dropped in at work.After she left,boss made a comment bout her that went something like this..

Boss: Eh,that girl your friend is it?
Me : Yup.
Boss : Wah,quite pretty ah.Her hair so nice.And she uses make up somemore,looks very pretty.
Me : Erm,yea.Alot of my batchmates use it alot,even just to come for lectures.
Boss : Yea,I can tell also.Some girls really care bout how they look and really take the effort to do it.

After a moment of silence.

Boss : I can tell if a girl wants to be pretty.Like like to put on make up and dress nicely.
Me : Oh. (What can i say,i was busy doing my work le...)
Boss : People like M...(looks at me and only when I look at her ) and like you la.
Me : *blink,blink* Har?
Boss : Yalah,u don't put make up.See how you sit also can tell your not the kind who cares about what people think about you.
(I was sitting crossleg on the chair in front of the computer in plane view for everyone who walks in to see my cinapek style of sitting.Not my fault le,its so uncomfortable to sit straight back doing work in front of the computer.And staring at the computer screen all day makes me even more uncomfortable so I NEED to get comfy if I want to finish my work...such innocence shot to the grown..cries)

Yes,this is not the first time that I've heard it.
I'm not a huge fan of donning make up and dressing to the nines.I may have a nifty stash of those artificial colouring used to paint the face like some form of artist's canvas but honestly I will say it here,I don't use much of it.
To prove it,I swear by the fact that some of the items in my stash are MORE than 5 years already.AND!!! Its still new,like it was still off the shelf.
The most I use,is a lip gloss and eye liner.Occasionally when I have break-outs and am on the out,I use concealer and face powder.I do always use a lip balm coz my lips crack easily from the dry air in uni to the point it bleeds.And yes,its REALLY painful when it bleeds.But other than that,everything else stays in the stash.
As to what prompt me to buy them,don't ask.I blame it on their attractive colours that just attracts me like a fish to a worm.Lol..

Taking a trip back to the past,I remembered when someone first brought up this very same topic.

Flash back 1 :
Grandpa came down for a visit when I was still in high school.He and dad got talking bout something i cant quite remember.Me was happily jumping off the stairs when he suddenly turned and said "U must also learn how to dress properly next time.Looks give people the first impression about u.Must learn to dress nicely,especially if you want to go for interviews.And act properly also la.Don't be so unlady like."
Yes,i nearly missed my footing when that happen.

Flash back 2 :
This was sometime very much later,my dad brought up the exact same thing.Like I did not listen to the first time grandpa mentioned it.
"The way u dress carries what kind of person you are.Its important to dress right for the occasion.Don't simple wear anything just because."
I think my dad was referring to the fact that back then,I was always in baggy clothes and on occasions,even to functions in jeans.YES,i think Dank,will have a field at that statement and this next one.I wore baggy clothes when i was in high school cause I love the freedom of movements it gave me.
Until someone thought I was so kesian to wear oversized hand-me-downs from my non-existent brother and mistook me for a kid coz of my size.Sheesh..such prejudice against small size people.

Flash back 3 :
An uncle in church brought up the SAME topic again when I was usherring in the front.

Church uncle :Girl,your already in college ledi.How come u don't use any make up wan?
Me : Har? What for?
Church uncle : Coz all the other girls ur age using some.See,they look so nice.
Me : *small laugh*Aiyo,I only come to church la,don't need to wear until THAT nice.After that just go home only so dun need la.
Church uncle : But you look so pale la.At least with some on,you wouldn't look so pale.And maybe look fresher.Looks is important.Cause it creates impression.Must dress nicely too.
Me : ...........
Point to note,I blame the flourescent lights for making me look pale.Then again,I'm slightly anaemic so maybe the finger points back to me.Oh,and because I was on duty,I have to wake up earlier and being not much of an early riser,it probably explains why I look pale and dead in the morning.And for my choice of tacky clothes :P
And no,that does not mean I dress to the nines and don make up for church.I still don my favourite jeans and tees,no make up coz i want the extra minutes snoozing :P

But honestly,I don't see the point of donning that much make up and dressing up so nice.I've seen women who apply so much foundation it literally MELTS off their face like icing on a cake and some dressing like they are going for a dinner gala when they are only selling frozen meat in a small shop.I've known some who take HOURS to beautify themselves and take painstalking hours of rummaging through their warehouse amount of clothes,JUST to go out and get a couple of groceries.
Is that logical to anyone out there?
Ok,fine,true,you don't know who might be watching but do u really care WHO is watching?
On the finer note,WHO ARE you expecting to be watching you?Again,does it really matter if and why they are watching?
Why couldn't all women be like men,just thrown on a shirt and pants and alil scent to cover up the bad BO and out the door we go.Why the fuss bout getting the hair right,the make up right and getting the right clothes to go with the right shoes and the right bag?

No wonder they say women are complicated.
Heck,even I'm flabbergasted with my own spesies.

Gay-shiatness

2009-08-01T15:53:00.002+08:00

No,not referring to that kind of gay (guy-guy).
In modern terms,the word 'gay' is used to define ultimate awesomeness or something that seems totally out of this world.

"That was some gay-shiat" = "That was awesome"
"That guy is so gay" = " That guy is awesome/cool"

U get the picture la.

Anyway,gayness to me comes in many forms.

The first :
Yup,u saw her in FF7AC and Dead Fantasy.The only chick who kicks ass with her bare hands..
Since we're on dead fantasy...

The second :
You remember monty oum?

The third:
You remember Pachelbel's Canon in D?
Remember the gay Korean dude who made it a sensation by jamming it out on his electrical guitar?

Now check this lil monkey out.
Yes,his alil Korean as well.
Whats up with Korean's these days,you just have to wonder..

Wonder if its in the kimchi they eat everyday.Must have some brain enhancing effects to produce seriously gay people like these..
There's more from that in youtube.Just search Sungha Jung.
How much more gay can he get?

The fourth:

Was in the car on the way to work one day listening to Hitz and they mentioned bout Tom Felton (Yup,the guy who played lil Louie in Anna and the King and more recently,Draco Malfoy in HP) has his own musical band thingy.Got alil curious and went to search it up.

Gotta admit though,his pretty good.And quite the looker too*grinz*
And he plays the guitar so well (extra plus dream points)
I remembered when the movie first came up bout 6 years ago,my fren who was overly crazy bout Tom Felton told me he was actually born the same year as we were.I found that rather hard to believe especially after watching the show.He looked just like an 8 year old kid.How was that lil kid suppose to be a 15 year old back then?Unless UK kids mature really slowly..

Does this look like 15 year old to you?

Anyway,what the heck.His going out with a PA from the HP troup so too bad.
There's more of his composition and performance on youtube and his fan site,termed feltbeats.com.

Me thinks his got potential as a musician too.Kinda like his songs coz its not long and draggy.

Think that rounds up the gay list for now.

Wait,there's one more...

FRANGIPANI!!
Haha,insiders joke.

Toodles!

Delayed post :)

2009-07-18T23:48:00.003+08:00

So while I was bored,I managed to finish editing some of my pictures.
And hence,here they are as I have promised (cause a blog full of words is seriously boring,that I can vouch for)

Going way back to the month of April 2009..
Clair de Lune

Because I was Ball queen nominee,this was only a small part of the torture I had to endure.
Depicting the rehearsal the day before the ball where we had to cat walk (I'm not a cat,and PeiHua said I walked like I'm goin to Pasar.....*sweat* ) and with the people who helped paint my face and (slightly burnt) styled my hair.Seriously..
I smelt my hair burning and the girl DID burn my ear with the curler.I'm NEVER gonna curl my hair or do anything funny with it.It scared the shiat out of me.

Then on that night itself...
We became free entertainers for the crowd.Had to come up with a 'talent' so there I am,with my motley crew of hot babes who helped drown out my croacking and awful playing and take the limelight away from me.Love u babes..And you too Yeen,Chloe and Mummy Qiannie!!
Because ball pics are everywhere,I'm not gonna blog bout it much.Just click on some of the IMU links and u'l see all the pics u want (But please close ur eyes to the ugly pics of me..I swear u'l bleed to death from ur eyes if u stare long enough).
I will blog bout the great ppl i have in IMU when I feel like it soon though *grinz*
Back to the ball..
Self explanatory.Pic on the extreme right is with my partner in crime for that night,Jason who seriously looks Korean that I thought he was Korean when I first saw him.

And fastforwarding to May after exams,I got whisked away to KK.
Beautiful,beautiful KK that I have now set my heart on either working there or retiring there one day.Or make it my common holiday destination *grinz again*
Went tripping to KK with cousin and aunt,and just me,sis and the mummy.Pretty cute lil starfish :)
What trip will it be without food rite?Lower bottom right pic is sis with our future cool car we want to have in our home and just drive around in the garden in our ultimate laziness.
Awesome!!
Tripping up to Mt KK in a Proton Saga 1.3 l was NOT fun at all.Could hear the engine straining even on gear 2 and the drive up felt like FOREVER!!!
But the reward was WORTH IT!!!*dance dance*
Nearing the summit of Mt KK,we had to stop to take these pics.
Another reason why Mt KK rocks?
IT HAS A DAIRY FARM!!
WITH DAIRY COWS!!
And I'm not talking bout the ugly brown and black kampung cows we see on lower grounds.I'm talking BLACK AND WHITE COWS!!
Yea,as you can see,I was trying to take a as close as possibel pics to my cows.My dream retirement home?
A house on Mt KK with a small farm.Wil blog more bout it another time.
Nature always has its calling for me.And I don't mean THAT nature.I'm talking bout really outdoor nature.
*dance dance again*
The canapy walk that is not for the faint heart,vertigophobics (like me) and not for the weak cause the climb up was seriously knee breaking and what more when you walk across the rickety-one piece of plank bridge.
But again,the journey was to die for (literally and not literally).View was B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L!!!
On our last day,we took to civilisation adventure.Stuck to shopping at the malls and indulging in a Fish Spa (where the lil monsters swarmed my feet and I felt like I hogged all the fish and left not much for my sister and cousin.The mum's were having a foot message).While the mum's mostly hit the stores,the kids hit the book store.
Guess its an All Yeo Girls thing to be nerds.Hehe..
Thus ends up trip to KK.

I shal now end it with some scenic pics of Why I fell in love with KK.
The tea garden with its rolling hills of tea trees and just other trees.
The sunset (which is the same anywhere actually but I still love sunsets,as long as its along a beach *grinz* )

And the heart of all that I heart....
Mt KK and its majestic sights.

By the way,you don't have to squint ur eyes till its sepet to see the pics.Just scroll over to the pics and put alil extra weight on your right index finger over the selecter of ur mouse and u can see it BIG BIG!

Toodles!!

2009-07-18T16:46:00.003+08:00

And so once again,I'm down with the weekend flu.Never fails to catch me there seeing that i always wake up with that annoying ithching nose that later translates to a whole day of my nose feeling like this...

And eyes looking like this...

And me just being like this...
Come to think bout it,with H1N1 flying about,I'm not suprised if I'm carrying the virus itself.
Oh wait,no body aches.Oh well...Maybe I'm immune to the strain as I'm always catching viral flu's from nowhere.

Started work in uni's SAD.
Don't laugh,it is what it stands for...SAD!!!

Ok,so i lied,its not that sad a place to work in.Its actually pretty fun,with all the stress and piling work.New students coming in to 'claim' they've sent in documents which is on occasion inexistent (or on our part,we probably lost it but thats not my fault cause I just joined the band wagon).
And if the first sentence of that previous paragraph sounds familiar to you,I'm gonna say it to clarify things..
I'M A WORKAHOLIC!!
I need work to sustained me from being idle.I need work to keep me from thinking too much.I need work to kill my boredom.I need work to keep me from being depressed.I need stress to get my pumped up from the day.I need stress cause stress is fun (to me,that is).I need stress cause I love stress (I'm not sick in the head when I say that).
I'm not weird either.Its pretty normal for some people to love work.
And though I complain bout it at the end of the day,I still look forward to the next working day and welcome the madness that follows.
Which probably explaines why I am always itching to work alot.

But work also has its down points.
1) I'm suppose to be on break and on holiday.WORK'S keeping me from it.I can take leave off but when I get back,the work load is doubled.No fun there.

2)Tis the time when friends are coming back from Timbaktoo and God knows where.No time to meet up with them cause I'm always burnt out at the end of the day.

3)Let's not talk bout friends coming back from Timbaktoo.Talk bout the friends staying on this forsaken land itself.Still not much time cause again,I'm burnt out.Weekends are my sleep in days (and flu days)

4)I don't see the sun anymore.I go in when the sun is rising,I leave when the sun is or has set.Why is the sun important? Cause I love the sun.Sunshine makes me happy.Ironically,my favourite kinddie song happens to run like this :
You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are grey
You'l never know dear
How much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away
Which also explains why I love goin to islands when I'm on holiday and why I love being in the sun more than cooped up in uni's North Pole or anywhere else.Also explains why I hate cold and welcome the sweat and heat anytime of the day,sans when I'm sleeping.

So,bring out some blast from the past stuffs..
And because I am lazy to edit the picstures,I shall stop here.

And partly also because my bed's calling me to lie down..

Toodles!!

Of Yasmin Ahmad and her hits

2009-06-24T11:53:00.003+08:00

Who's Yasmin Ahmad?

If you don't know her,there can be 2 valid reasons why so:
1) Your too into overseas movies you fail to see the talents of our local culture
2)You don't watch local movies
3) Your just ignorant
4)Your a really sad case..

Yasmin Ahmad made headlines a few years back with her movies Sepet and Mukhsin. She also produced some local adverts that carries deep meanings if pondered on properly.
Go google her and read on her many stunning achievements.
Or just click here and read bout her.
While your at it,check out her blogs too.
And her new blog :)
And from me,I have to say she knocks my socks off on my previous perception of local films.
Yes,Truth betold,i was no2.

To be honest,I wouldn't have really known bout her work if i hadn't made that trip to Singapore as a stop over from KK. Can you believe it took me an overseas trip just to see how talented some of our locals are? Seriously, back here we don't really publize much about the local works but over there,they are making it like some huge event of a thing.Do we under appreciate our local talents?

Anyway,Singapore hired her to make a film about family.As you know,Singapore's population is slowly decreasing by the years as more and more new families only opt for 1 child only following China's policy due to its overpopulation.But I guess in Singapore its more of a different pov that causes most families to opt for 1 child only.Namely :

1)Small housing areas = grandpa says they live in Pigeon holes :)
2)The stress level = Not just from the education but also the working environment.From a medical point of view its unhealthy in both ways leading to depression and suicide and of course,infertility.
3)We are the future generation = thats from a song that I kinda forgot bout,only that line.Think it was from Burn Out 3.Anyways,being the future generation we place our career first over marriage and building a happy family.Mainly cause more and more women are seeing it as a form of pre-historic thinking to just confined themselves to household duties when there is so much to gain from the pre-historic men's world.With that in mind,more and more couples are marrying late.Then cames the media who imprints this idea that there is always this of-so-perfect guy out there for us and being women who grew up on fantasy storied bout Knights in Shining armours and what not,we tend to restrict ourselves to that dream of meeting that person. This kidan applies to the men too so don't think you guys escape this.Like how Snow White sang :
Some day my prince(princess) will come
But wake up!
Thats not really the reality.

So back to the why this post is up.
Because their population is decreasing by the year,the Singapore goverment hired Yasmin to do a advert to dispel the populations believes.
Before I put the video up (or your probably reading this while its loading),try not to think of what its really screaming at you.They say a picture paints a thousand words.Try to read the other 999 words its painting.
Millions of kudos to her.
This little advert is titled The Funeral.

Of Childhood movies and Hallmark movies

2009-06-11T11:42:00.005+08:00

While I was sick in bed yesterday,I had this itch to watch something from my kiddie days that would somewhat brighten up my already down and out mood for various reasons besides the obvious of being sick.
So I rummaged through my old CD stack and blindly pulled out...

Hehe..Such childish cravings.Brought back such innocent laughters watching Brom and Speed,and maybe alittle of childhood dreams and fantasy watching the Odette and Derek together.And the songs always either bring tears or a smile..Sigh.
Of course,my favourite scene is the one right at the beginning deplecting the two stars growing up and on each other's neck until well...hormonal changes occur,and puberty hits.
Speaking of puberty,does it ever occur to anyone how Derek's eyes look oddly like he has thyroid stare? His sclera's are quite obvious above and below his cornea.Was that on purpose or was that just how the animators thought would aid medical students in the future or just animators?And why does he look so buffed compared to the other characters?Or is it just the clothes that just goes poofed?
This is gonna sound really corny but,maybe he has hyperthroidism.Since he couldn't sit still most of the time,especially after Odette went missing (Wasn't one of the S&S of hyperthyroidism hyperactivity? )
I think I just spoilt the movie from most of us who loved it so much :P
Forgive me,medical stuffs kinda kick in nowadays since I don't really study it anymore.

Question though,
What does 'Far longer than forever' means?

Anyways,after watching that movie,I managed to get some real shut eyes and woke up feeling way better than I usually do.
Hrm,guess I found my 'other' panadol to my fevers :)

Anyways,then came this morning over breakfast was flipping through Astro and its sad choice of movies when I stumbled on this on the Hallmark channel.

I have to say this first,I LOVE HALLMARK MOVIES!!
They always carry the best shows that emphasizes themes and issues that people mostly disregard nowadays.They beat most movies on the screens anytime.
The worst part bout their movies?
They make me tear :'(
But given any time or day,I'll still pick a Hallmark movie to watch if I'm not into childhood movies.
Back to Mom a Sixteen,it tackles alot of issues that most adolescene are currently undergoing.Mainly : sex,seduction,runaways,and the prime of it...teenage pregnancy.

Most people would say its not our culture on this side of the planet for this to happen,its always the US culture blah blah blah.But seriously,people,if its not such a problem here,then why are there increasing numbers of places to do illegal abortions and the rising numbers of teenage pregnancy?Lets not forget,STD's and runaways and all that comes with that neat little package wrapped in that pretty bow that harbours all that we label 'ONLY IN USA'.

We tend to think that we Asians have a better sense of morality,we'l never do sex before marriage and heck,we're too grounded in our roots to do it.Have you seen that amount of ppl in the night clubs?And wake up call,how many of the new generations are really grounded in their roots or believes?Most of us claim we're of a certain religion but how many uphold that teachings?

I admit,I myself am partly hypocritical to my Christianity teachings,having done alot of things that would have condemned me to hell in the old days.But I've grown to realize my mistakes and am slowly learning from it.After al,no changes take place overnight.

And puh-leaze...they don't do sex?

Wake up,their doing it like its their cup of tea,their everyday meals,some of them even do it like if they don't they'll fall flat and die and the world will forget bout them.Some can even compete with sex workers and probably earn more than them if they did started charging for every second spent.For all we know,the rising numbers of sex before marriage and out-of-marriage-pregnancy might just rival that of 'ONLY IN USA'.

Like it was said in the movie by the Jacey's teacher, "What they sell on TV,MTV and music videos,are they all saying that its ok?"
To which the whole class of idiots who think with their crotch and vagina's echoed 'YEAH!'

Dumb-ass who would one day be leaders of a gret nations.

Maybe that label that reads 'ONLY IN USA' is not ONLY in USA anymore.
Maybe its reaching our shores and worst yet,has already landed and made its home..

What's wrong with the world today?

random thoughts again with rock climbing

2009-06-07T22:28:00.003+08:00

So out of my awesome boredom I decided to catch hold of Zhao and blackmailed him to take me rock climbing.
And rock climbing we did today..

Until my arms felt like they were going to tear away from the ligaments that binds them to my clavicle,scapula and glenoid fossa. Oh and my head of humerous almost got severed from the glenoid fossa during one of my moments of hanging between life and death.
Ok,not so much of death as there's the rope to cling on too.
But still, my arms felt like they could break any moment.
And the funny part is..
I love that feeling.
I could think of nothing else at the point of time.Only how to cling on to that piece of protruding coloured rough surfaced plastic from the wall and not let go.Like if it was a real life scenario where you're dangling 100 meters away from solid ground.
That feeling of nothing else matters,and the only thing I could think of was the sheering pain in my arms from trying to hold on and not let go.Amidst Zhao's screaming of where to put my hand/feet next.Not that I don't appreciate it,thanks buddy :)
I love the moment of thinking of nothing else in the world.Everything vanishes and nothing matters except whats at hand.
The adrenaline rush.
Pushing my body to its limit that it literally screamed for rest.
The sweat that forms and beads down my face and back profusely.
And everything else is just...

GONE!!

I want that feeling again.
I want to think of nothing.
Worry bout nothing.
Let everything evaporate into...
NOTHINGNESS!!

Which is now making me crave a climb up Klang gates.
And for that extra push in madness..
I want to do it in less than 5 stops.

I think the long breaks making me crazy..

Why does my player always play the same dang song even on random?
If there's a price for rotten judgement,
I guess i've already won that (I think I won the Nobel prize for it already)

Kick ass vids you HAVE to watch!

2009-06-03T22:16:00.014+08:00

Never have I in my wildest dreams ever dreamt of owning one of these babies.I never looked twice at it cause heck,I'm happy with my PS2 at the moment.I'm happily keeping it working since its been silent and dead for aeons already so time to kick its gear into high gear before I leave it to rot again :)

Yups,back to the above pics.

I never wanted one of these babies until dear CheeRon showed me this (I still hate you for that cause now I have to save up for more stuffs to buy as it is..but I still appreciate u as a friend,don't get me wrong k *smiles* )

Can you blame me for being such a sucker for Final Fantasy series??

What is that you ask?

This is what its all about!!

I WANT A PSP!!

AND I DON'T GIVE 2 HOOTS ITS ONLY AVAILABLE IN JAP AT THE MOMENT!!

All the FF characters...
*drools*
And in the same game!!
ALL PLAYABLE!!!

Forgive my over-enthusiasm but this is what i live for...

And the best part of all and what I always love about FF games.

All the best of FF songs in one go!!!
I could die and go to heaven happily now..
Oh wait,I cant.
But atleast if i died,I'l die happy cause I got half my dream ticked.To hear all the songs of FF.
I still want to go for the orchestra.Been keeping my eye out for it (and my money too cause I don't care where it is,I WANT TO GO!!!)
I'm a sucker for FF songs,especially Nobuo Uemetsu.His like the God of FF songs *bows down*

GAWD!!!
Someone help me now before I go insane with needs and happiness watching this on youtube.

And here's another KICK ASS vid for the ladies to show Gal Power's still the bomb.

All credits to moutyoum.The video is AWESOME!!!
Tifa is heck droolable cool cause I love the way she kicks ass.
And Rinoa's a bit gay (cause she can use gay magic,can fly and she uses Squall's gunblade which I WANT!!!) but she rocks too...
And Rikku's so cute :)

As you can clearly read between the lines,I DO NOT support DOA chicks and I'm proud to admit that *grinz*

I'm so not your average demure girl..
But who cares right?
*Gives innocent smile*

just 3 words...

2009-05-18T23:02:00.005+08:00

LIFE IS UNFAIR!!!

Dun ask why,its my motto for the day..

And no,this is not my celebration post either..

Want to know my next 3 word motto of the day?

LIFE JUST SUCKS!!!!!

Then again,who said life was this?

Talk about irony..
Wonder if its a pain or ecstasy to lie on that kind of bed?
What bout the thorns beneath the roses?

I hate drugs..
I hate teratomas...
I hate pontine nucleus..
I hate BS (not bull faeces)
I hate that damn DING DING bell..

I hate reality check

~~~~~~~~~

And before the clock strikes 12...
Cinderella is not running anywhere...

With Mum in Teluk Cempedak..My emo beach :)
HARPEE BIRTHDAY JIE!!!
(Hey,its another 3 word too *grinz*)

I realise i dun have alot of pics of us tog :( Must take more sully pics together..
Hehe..
MWA!!!
*throws confetti and gives u a NICE BIG HUGE HUGS!!!*
Love u Jie!

My 100th post!!

2009-05-10T18:31:00.002+08:00

Not such a bad way to treat my 100th post considering that in exactly a week's time i'l be heading heads on to my doom like some lunatic suicidal headless chicken.Ok, I lied.This is a terrible way to celebrate my 100th post but give me a break k.My hippocampus and frontal cortex can only take that much and I'm no AI to automatically store new info permanently in there unless I hit the Delete button or Reformat my brain.

Anyways..

Forget what I said in my last post.

I OFFICIALLY HATE BIG BANG THEORY, HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER AND I HATE FACEBOOK!!

I HATE THE IDIOT BOX AND I HATE MY BED AND HUBBY CAUSE BEING UNDER TEH SAME ROOF AS THEM HAS THIS SUPER-BOOMBASTIC-GRAVITATIONAL EFFECT THAT GRAVITATES ME TO THEM!!!

Ok,I lied again.

I officially hate them untill my results are out.

Then I'l Love them like crazy!!!

Seems like people celebrate their 100th post with something nice to read etc..
Not so the case here.
Oh well,guess I'l just have to celebrate with my 101th post....or 102nd....or 103rd...

Oh what the heck..

CANT WAIT FOR EXAMS TO BE OVER AND GONE WITH!!
Then again,i cant cause I'm not prepared and I don't want to go for resits.

God help me again...

This sucks..

I want to go shopping...
I want to lie on the beach all day and night and get burnt to crisp in the morning and afternoon killer rays then get cooled off by the night breeze...
I want to go mountain climbing again..
Go hiking...
Go out on crazy get-togethers with friends...
I want to snuggle up in the most comfortable sofa with the most mind-boggling or romantic book ever to read...
Or watch a movie that gets me in the mood..
Or just snuggle up on the sofa with someone who's willing to snuggle up with me and listen to me snore or rant bout everyday patheticness and that person doesn't have to do anything except engage lightly or just listen (or pretend to listen intentively) and smile..
(Hrm,come to think bout it,snuggling up on the sofa with a puppy would be nice too)

I want to...

Just have a life besides binding myself (weakly) to my chair and table...

~Have I found you,Flightless bird,jealous, weeping or lost you~

Latest updates you don't really want to read..

2009-04-30T18:38:00.002+08:00

So summatives have just come to an end *Throws the confetti's and brings out the alcohol..oh wait,I'm suppose to be staying clear of that* Didn't end with a big bang like it usually does as 2 weeks from today will see me facing the gallows once again although, the gallows will probably be bigger with even more meaner executioners and a bigger crowd to boot as audience.

So what has happen from the time span of the previous emo post to this current boring post part 2?

Nothing much honestly.Life really goes on and its all bout if I wanted to take the time to sit there and ponder on it or just brush it by and shrug it off as part and parcel of life thats just not worth brooding over. Seriously,its not like I suddenly got shot with some gamma rays and become a hot,sexy (or ugly) huge beast that opens its mouth to roar and speak in barely comprehendable english (Yes,I'm kinda taking the piss at the hulk) or got bitten by a mutated spider and now can scale walls and put the acclaimed 'SpiderMan' to shame ( then again,wouldn't dream of being even in the same room with spiders).What it all boils down to is,well,just open the papers and you'l probably nod your heads and agree with me.....

LIFE JUST SUCKS AND IT STILL GOES ON CAUSE THERE"S NOTHING WE CAN DO BOUT IT!!!

*burns fireworks to celebrate the dose of reality*
So what really happen then?

Besides making the library my new camping grounds,which is really not bad cause considering that its pretty comfy and there's food (well,until 7pm that is then after that ur pretty much on your own) and the great company there is there.But really,what ticks me off is the parasites that come hogging my place.I know this sounds really delusional and dementic but HELLO!!! Are you people that BLIND to not see the I CAMP THERE EVERY FREAKING DAY!!! GRR!! Do I really have to sign the table in my blood to kick the parasites out??Geeez..
Think its the stress from studying and camping in the library alot (I think the MMS and air in the library has a tad lil effect on me) But really,i find it REALLY annoying when I walk in after lectures to see some delusional idiot blissfully wasting a good space in the library to yak and flirt.There's a place and time for that,u wasted sperm AND ITS NOT AT MY PLACE!!!And for crying out loud,if you don't want people to know what it is that so important for you to disucss with the OTHER WASTED SPERM, GO DO IT SOMEWHERE WAYYYYYYY OUT OF EARSHOT!! Some geniuses IMU takes in.Where in the world are their God-given brains,one can only wonder cause it definitely doesnt' seem like they have it where its normally kept.That or they have not been using it for the past 2 decades or so that they've been walking this face of the earth.Sad cases...
But otherwise,to say that I"m happy camping in the library is an incomplete truth as I don't like it but I have too (yes,IMU stuck a knife in my back and force me to do it).I'm starting to take a great liking for it and at the same time,it kinda gives me the nausea and traumatic feeling everytime I think bout it.I guess too much of something really gets ou sick.Oh no...does that mean I'l get sick of Dr House or chocolates??
NOOOOOO!!!!!!

Anyway,regardless of not if I DO get sick of House,I found a new sitcom that I'm dying to watch (cause of the Oh-sp-great-EOS)but nonetheless,I'm on a mania of downloading it so that I can lock myself in my room after EOS,stock pile high withmy favourite junkie and watch it till my eyes pop out of its orbits.If that even happens..hehe
BIG BANG THEORY!!
Cool geeky comedy that really had me rolling in laughter,well unless your cortex works alil slow then you probably wouldn't get the joke cause its all science jokes)And I love the catch line :
Smart is the new sax-ay!!!
I LOVE SHELDON!!! Haha,curt and sarcastic..I think I love sarcastic people (Sans one which i shall not mention :P )But I hope I dun end up with one.Can imagine the end of WorldWar's we'll be having since I admit,I have an ego to boot at times.I think I shall recorrect that sentence..
I love shows with witty-sarcastic-deep-humoured-with-cute-guys.
Still adore House though.

Watching CNN now.
Swine fever is back!!! WHEE!!! More epidemics to make the world a better place and add colours to the medical world...No,I'm not sadistic.I just think its funny yet sad yet so predictable that this things happen.I wonder how 'we' are doing about it...First we had the SARS,now this..When will it ever stop..

Which reminds me,a few lectures back,there was one particular lecture kinda offended me to a certain extend.The content of the lecture was educational and interesting.Well,it was really until she pointed out bout people who are different.Well,not that she pointed out but it was how she catagorized people as 'mentally ill'.One particular criteria just really threw me off and I felt like throwing my pen at her (or something heavier to knock the socks out of her)..I am starting to lose my respect to psychiatrist for that really offensive statement...

People who see ghost are not crazy,atleast those who can genuinely see them..Thats just plain rude.

Well,cause I'm really not into a whole typo mood I'l just post up the pics (and put in some silly comments) and the rest I shall let ur frontal cortex to the job :)

As pics are still incoming and still in the process of editting (but to be honest,I'm just pure lazy and really am in no mood to stare at the screen to edit and etc..I just said that to make it sound like I'm doing it) And partly cause I'm in need to study for my finals which,by putting up pics and blogging is NOT IN ANYWAY GOING TO HELP ME PASS henceforth....

This blog might be officially be dead for the next few weeks to come..

Have a Great Labour day and and great day all tog..

Toodles..

Oh,and for a little lame humour side of me...

HAPPY LABOR(DOUR) DAY!!!

Cheesy yes?

Sorry to burst you bubble but....

2009-04-25T22:16:00.001+08:00

I is not updating till after exams coz I has no time to thinky-think bout anything much now...

SO SORRY >_<

Warning,not for the weak heart or to those who has not seen my OTHER side

2009-04-01T01:01:00.003+08:00

SCREW YOU AND SCREW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU, YOU WASTED SPERM!!!!

*To those who just receive the culture shock,you've been warned.I am not as sweet as I appear..sometimes*

Stress,then again,who isn't?

Bored part....infinite?

2009-03-16T23:30:00.004+08:00

Because I was bored and Qianhui sent me this webpage along time ago...

This was just really random and lame of me....

Create Fake Magazine Covers with your own picture at MagMyPic.com

No,I never appeared in any magazine (except school magazines)..
To show how bored i am from studying...
And to provide u with a good excuse to laugh and de-stess...

I am SO NICE!!! *jump,jump*

Shameless of me,I know... :P

Home Coming and one less emo post!

2009-03-13T16:16:00.004+08:00

Guess who's coming back to Malaysian soil ( but at such an ungodly hour of the day)...

Juju : Who? *while blissfully sipping her teh-tarik*

JUJU!!!!

I'm so happy I could fly to the moon and back now..

But at 6am on the morning >_<
My beauty slp time...huhu. But for juju,Me is willing to go to airport and see her back.YESH YESH!!! WHEE!!! *jumps,jumps*

I miss my juju.
So happy she's coming home..
So thats one thing to brighten up my emo blog
*cough cough to andrew the kepo*

Hrm,looking back at the picture,I wonder if the cat's coming along too. Just what I need to relieve my stress at the moment.. *evil grinz*

Now got motivation to study...
lalala....

Roller-coasters and hate me's!

2009-03-12T21:05:00.005+08:00

There was a song that rang somewhere along the lines of :
Life is a roller coaster

What that translate to is,life's full of ups and downs.Sometimes times are good,then it'l be followed by bad times and vice versa.Whatever it is,it'l always turn out the other way around when you least expect it (or unless your psychic and you can tell when it's coming).
But there are exceptions...

Like when the line breaks,and you're forever stuck at a certain track.It would be nice to be stuck at the top of course.But when you're stuck at the bottom,its a different matter all together.
And some,just seem to stop at a certain point of that track.The cart wouldn't go forward,neither will it go backwards.And with the so-called-safety harness strap tightly onto you,you can only sit there helplessly waiting for the technicians to come rescue you.
If they ever do...( coz we're in Malaysia,so you can bet they'l take aeons to come)

That's how I see my life as.But unfortunately,instead of having its ups and downs,it seems to only be going constantly downhill and never breaks to take the slow crawl up.The only occasional ups are but really small 'bumps' that later resumes its downward journey.Its like looking into a voidless area where u can only see the tracks alil ahead of you,but not wats beyond that or where it goes.
Which really sucks cause looking back,life seems pretty pathetic.

Those I thought I could trust turns their back on me after giving me a nice stab with halberd or pike.
Those I thought would appreciate the things I do for them,end up slapping me in the face for it after happily receiving what they wanted.
Those I thought I could know that there's nothing to hide from me anymore.
Those I thought would never leave me in the dark cold room all by myself and fend for myself when danger lurks or the bitter icy winds licks my bare skin.
Those I thought,would stand by my side no matter what comes our way and hold tightly to my hand.
Those I thought would be the first few person I'l see when I turn my head back for help.
Where were you when I needed you?

'You better not be lying,you two-face dog'
~ Lamia,Stardust~

A pinch from the sound advice.
True to that fact,the world IS FILLED with TWO-FACED (not dogs) but people.Best yet,these are the few people who should have been seen strutting their stuffs on the red carpets at the Academy Awards recently held.Although,the Academy will probably go bankrupt cause there's just two many of best actors and actress' awards to give away.And to think they have to recover that amount in a year to repeat the cycle again the next year.Hollywood's star walk of fame would probably have to extend to the entire US region cause there is not tiles to go around for everyone in Hollywood alone.
I wonder if i should feel sorry for these people or hate them with every fiber in my being.Or just ignored their pathetic waste-of-sperm beings.Then again,to ignore them is simply impossible cause even the smallest stone can cause some ripple in the water.So I'l left with the options of feeling sorry for them,or hate them.But since I can't really to the latter,guess I'm left with having to feel sorry for them cause of their blindness and ignorance to their imprint on others.And their foolishness in thinking that the world is as dumb as it looks so no one will know their Hyde.Another class of SPOILT BRATS who thinks everyone is their chesspiece and how they play them is how they want them to be.Who believe that they can get away with what they want by cooing me,and suddenly being the bestest of buddies,who flirt and bats their now-a-days fakely extended eyelashes and throw on that sweet smile that is suppose to melt my heart (Newsflash,it only makes me boil over and want to punch the living day lights out of your pathetic face). Totally shameless wasted sperms.

And because the title also says "Hate Me"

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you
Hate me in ways, yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

Hate Me,Blue October.

Pretty good band.Go look it up.

On a not so happier note,I've nailed the dangy household presentation with not so much of the grace of a swan but like a running hippo.Good thing the crowd was more amused with the odd pics rather than listen to me drone on and on bout Seremban folks.Least thats over and done with.Anymore dumb presentations that I'm forced to present and I'l really consider alot of evil things that I shall not mention here.

......

2009-02-28T18:50:00.005+08:00

Life sucks when :

1) I have nothing to do on my comp cause there's no more fun games to play anymore and even if there was,I can't play it till the end cause of reason #2

2) I have nothing nice to read except my Mt KK lecture notes and medical books. Going insane just looking at my pile smiling back at me and calling 'READ ME!!!'

3) There's no new music anymore that catches my fancy cause downloads are so slow and I can't stand the modern music of screaming and angsty theme of late.

4) I'm bored stiff in my room and just staring at my fan spinning on its axis

5) There's nothing nice to watch on TV (blardy ASTRO!!!! Always playing shiatty movies not worth watching.Probably bought all those C-grade movies dirt cheap)

6) There's no food in my room anymore except disgusting,rock hard,tasteless,and smooshed up energy bar that has been lying in my room since....I can't remember when but I was hungry and desperate >_<

7) My fridge's been raided off all my usual junkies. Ie, chocolates and fruits. And I need my junky wheel snacks (those who went KKB with me knows what that is )

8) Its raining now and I cant sleep cause I can't sleep whenever I want to anymore.Think I have hyperinsomnia (opposite of insomnia)

9) I am in the mood to go shopping but I cant bring myself to go out cause of the JAMS and the PARKING MADNESS!!! and there's no sales *cries* That and I'm probably really fickle minded when I shop and have nothing in particular I want to buy.

10) My player's been running on emo shuffled songs.What bout all my happy songs?!!

11) I want to scream at the top of my lungs bout things I want to get out of my chest but I know better than to do so cause doing so will bring about REALLY HATED AND UNDESIRABLE CONSEQUENCES!!!

12) Looking at my calender and seeing May 18th circled BIG BIG in RED!!! (Jie,not that its your birthday but you know what else is on that fateful day la..love you loads still..)

13) Since its raining now, can't go pasar malam to restock my cheap and favourite junkie.And no excuse to go jalan-jalan just to get out of the house and do something else besides my daily robotic routine. Can't even just take a walk just to get out of the house...*cries*
or go climb Klang gates *cries again*

14) I don't have a pet dog or puppy (hence the pic) to squeeze the life out of (not that I will actually squeeze the life out of it,its just a figure of speech) when I'm bored,LIKE NOW, or when I'm stress

15) I cant think of anything more to make it up to 20... Sigh....

Pretty flowers..

And because I'm sian-fied,

Love lifts us up where we belong...
Where eagles fly on mountain high...
Love leaves us out like we are fools...
Throw our lives away for one happy day..

~Moulin Rouge,Elephant Love Medley~

Baby,give me back my fantasy
The courage that I need to live
The air that I breathe
Living without you
My world's become so empty
Days are so cold and lonely
Each night I taste the purest of pain

~Purest of Pain,Forgot who sang it~

No chance no way
I wouldn't say it
(Give up Give in
Check the grin your in love)
This scene woudln't play
I wouldn't say I'm in love

~Disney Hercules~

Now I'm speechless
Over the edge
I'm just breathless
I never thought that I'd catch this
Love bug again
Hopeless,
Head over heels in the moment
I'd never thought that I'd catch this
Love bug again

~Love bug,Jonas Brothers~

My players running on emo songs again.

I need happy songs...

>_< style="font-style: italic; color: rgb(0, 102, 0);">I think I'm going crazy
I think I'm going crazy
Ur momma she get crazy
I think I'm getting crazy

~Crazy,Pitbull Ft Lil Jon~

Why I love disney so much?

2009-02-22T17:12:00.008+08:00

Found this on YouTube..
Made me love Disney's princess so much more..
*swoon*

Love this song..can u believe its by the same voices (well,almost,since some of them are not really here anymore) from the movie.....

*jump,jumps*

*Swoons again over disney's princess*

The lyrics for the song is so BEAUTIFUL!!!!
*swoons again*

If You Can Dream

There is a world where hope
And dreams can last for all time
A wondrous place to go
You'll know it when your heart finds

Hearing our song as old as rhyme
Hold my hand we're gonna fly
What a magic ride
And just a kiss away

If you can dream
The wish we're making
On a star is coming true
The colours of the wind will lead
My heart right back to you

'Cause if you can dream
Reflections in a diamond sky
Come shining on true
Romance will always be so new
And love will save the day
If you can dream

Someday my prince will come
It's certain as the sun rise
One day the slipper fits
Then you see the love in his eyes

It's a tale as old as time
There's no mountain we can't climb
When you're finally mine
And just a kiss away

If you can dream
The wish we're making
On a star is coming true
The colours of the wind will lead
My heart right back to you

'Cause if you can dream
Reflections in a diamond sky
Come shining on true
Romance will always be so new
And love will save the day
If you can dream

So the story goes
Never die the rose
There's a whole new world
Waiting there for us
(Waiting just for us)

If you can dream
The wish we're making
On a star is coming true
The colours of the wind will lead
My heart right back to you

'Cause if you can dream
Reflections in a diamond sky
Come shining on true
Romance will always be so new
And love will save the day
Love will say the day
If you can dream

Sigh,wish i could live 'MY' dreams too...
Brings back so much memories and takes me to somewhere I can only dream of going...
And since I'm in this really childish behaviour/mood now..

I WANT TO BE A DISNEY PRINCESS!!!!

~ROARS~

And I'm not ashame to wish for it...

~ROARS AGAIN~

Because I had to post something but have nothing to post about...

2009-02-04T21:47:00.002+08:00

Oh wait,since I'm here...

Found a house in Seremban ledi..
YEAH!!! PTL!!!
Before I even finish my EOS.
Now i need another blessing fulfilled..

PLEASE LET ME PASS EOS!!!! AMEN!!

Hrm,that was short...

Back to business...

Because thats what i want to do now but I CAN'T!!!

And cause its the only thing I'm good at...

ZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz.............

Another life's lesson learnt

2009-01-19T00:23:00.003+08:00

Was bored one day and happen to chance on this movie on HBO...
The story enthralled me not only for its theme but also the music and the strong acting by the lead actors that portrayed another Romeo and Juliet theme with a twist to the plot.But all in all,I love the movie.
One of the few lines that struck me the most was the scene when Christian (Ewan McGregor who is quite a looker in the show) was confessing to Satine (Nicole Kidman) that he loves her and tries to convince her that its OK to fall in love.

~ The greatest thing you'll even learn is to LOVE and BE loved in return~

And this the writer never fails to instill into the audience by repeating it again and again throughout the movie though a few times the line was not said by Christian but by others like the 'Sitar player' at the end when he remembered his line at the most crucial nail biting moment as Christian was about to walk out on Satine because he thought she had played him all along when she actually wanted to save him from the evil Duke (which didn't surprise me as most movies these days base their nemesis as the one with all the money but JUST had to be alil greedy or a pervert..sigh).

And because its a tragic romance movie,Satine dies at the end from either lung cancer or TB (wasn't mentioned in the movie except showing her coughing out blood and something bout 'dry cough' ? ) Sad,sad...*cries*

Then there was the song that also made me tear for personal reasons.When i read through the lyrics, I felt like it just took the words out of my mouth and subtle it into something that if directed properly,could make even the most hardest hearted person in this world fall on their knees and burst into tears. Of course,it also has to come from the right person cause any Tom,Dick or Harry will not give it that extra boost.

Come What May Lyrics

Never knew I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky before
Want to vanish inside your kiss
Every day I love you more and more
Listen to my heart, can you hear it sings
Telling me to give you everything
Seasons may change, winter to spring
But I love you until the end of time

Come what may
Come what may
I will love you until my dying day

Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace
Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste
It all revolves around you
And there's no mountain too high
No river too wide
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side
Storm clouds may gather
And stars may collide
But I love you until the end of time

Oh, come what may, come what may
I will love you, I will love you
Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place

Wish I could have the courage to say this out loud one day.
My gut instincts tells me I can do anything in the world but confess my true feelings even if it was a matter of life and death except to those whom I know will cause me no trouble and I can DEEPLY trust..
And this I know is true cause I've given up on many and yet still make many mistakes cause I took the wrong time to be brave.
Dumbdumb me..
Another added movie to my list of favourites.

And uni restarts in 8 hours time.Cries again...
4 months left till I kiss IMU BJ bye bye...

Should I be happy or sad that I'm leaving?
Mixed emotions again...

My dream job....

2008-12-28T00:26:00.003+08:00

So i was bored and decided since i have so much time at the moment,how bout surfing the net bout my future dream job. Refer to the Wish list and there's only ONE occupation dream there.

Yes,my dream is to be a trauma specialist/ A&E specialist. Yes,it also sounds like those GP or MO's in the hospitals working in the A&E but wait,they have a higher authority than most specialist and are more trained than anyone in dealing with various cases from peads to geriatrics,cardiac to renal.EVERYTHING!! And they are more trained in the resus area.I know it sounds glamourous (or to some,suidical) but thats the beauty that draws me so much to it.I'm not the kind that sticks to one thing and die with it.I love challenges and variety in everything I do.To a certain extend,I kinda love working under stress (don't ask why) which kinda explains why I have this tendency to get my hands into alot of things and juggle them like mad or that I tend to do things alil last minute or on the spot.

Anyway,enough of all that.Want to know more...its all here.
Trauma specialist

So yeah,if you read that article,you'l notice the line of obstacles i need to overcome to become a consultant in that field.And that is where my heart almost stopped.The training in the A&E I look forward too.But counting the years and not to mention,taking things from the maximun years cause i know i can never finish it in the minimal time.AND Not to mention the stoopid 2 years houseman training in Malaysia.Really considering running to US and screw my Malaysian license.But so far,i cant find a hospital in the US in the net that gives A&E training :(

Then something more dishearting came up...
Read this

Gila wei.If i don't get training in UK i'm doomed cause the MCEM paper is Uk based >_< style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(102, 0, 0);">it excites me more..
I'm crazy right?!
And on top of that,I have to complete the housemanship in Malaysia cause i need the damn license.Sigh....

Must work towards my goal.And nothing will stop me from it.YES!!!*tries to motivate myself desperately*
I know i'm planning way too early but hey,nothing wrong with preparing in advance right?

Though,i still have this nagging feeling I'm gonna be throwing my life away for this dream.Lil sacrifices that I will have to make that will affect my future like relationships,family and probably social life??!

Maybe I should just focus on EOS 5 at the moment...hehe..

Dreaming away now for it to come true.This and THAT!!*winkz*

Lazy to load pics so its a wordy post...lalala...

The picture says it all

2008-12-23T11:17:00.002+08:00

(the NAME is where i put in YOUR NAME :D )

Blessed X-mas and a Blessed New year everyone :)

Huggies!!

ZZZZ.....

2008-12-13T16:27:00.003+08:00

I'm leaving...On a ...BUS-SY
Dunno know when I'l be back again..
Oh BED I hate to let you go...

Leaving for kuantan tomorrow afternoon...
WHEE!!!!

BUT!!!!!
Gonna miss my bolster hubby coz so paiseh to bring him along in the bus..The agony of not hugging him to slp..The endless nights of discomfort and suffering..Huhu!!!

Shall bribe me dad to bring him down for me *Evil grinz*
Or is there akind soul who's heading to kuantan and wldn mind bringing my hubby for me?He'l be really quiet in the car,u wldn even know his there >_<
Dun worry,his CLEAN K!!! Cause i sleep with him everynight so must make sure his clean if not I'l never wake up to a new day..

Rainy weather...So nice to slp slp...

Miss climbing Klang Gates already :P Think I'm suppose to be a monkey,not human.Anyone for January to go on a death climb with me? >_<

Nature lover!!!!

2008-12-07T13:06:00.002+08:00

I suddenly have this burning desire to go jungle trekking again.
Partly cause i want to kick my long accumulated fats out from all that studying and long procrastinating jogs i use to do before the exam fever hit me.
And cause,I badly want to get out of the city and just take a stroll in nature to take time of and reflect on my life and love it more.Gives me the time to think back on my life and all the things I've done,how I could have done it and how I did.Just gives me time to think without falling asleep (opps..you didn't read that).
Many other reasons la but lets just put it short.
My life is all bout adventures besides food so,no adventure no life kay :)

Thankfully,God answered my prayers by making a writer write up bout this particular favourite activity of mine and was generous enough to provide this link
I love Nature
The link is in my Cool Sites
And who would have thought,all of it within my own compound.No more need to go back to Kuantan to hike.Of course I'l still go back for the lovely beaches and my granparents.And notty Rover and his crazy walks.
I want to go back here again!!!

Confession of the day : I'm a Nature FREAK! Sue me :P

Picture alert!!!

2008-12-05T14:22:00.012+08:00

So fast, another year comes to an end with a blink of an eye.Seems like life this year's been packed with more things to do :exams,constant studying,relationships gone astray,making new friends,more adventures (cheerleading was one of them..phew) and so many more.

Seems hard to capture it all in a memory box sometimes.At times,I wish I had this constant video camera running through my eyes that captures every second of what i see so that i can just sit back and watch it roll in years to come since i tend to forget things at times.Memories i desperately want to hold on too always slips away and those that i dun want to always stays.Sigh,something wrong with my brain liaw...

So.some things going on recently ....

Warning though,I tend to have WORDY post alot then all of the sudden,I'l hit the blog real hard with pics coz i'm lazy to wait for it to load when i'm blogging before exams :P
So,You've been warned :)

1)Recruitment Drive Day for Adventure Club- where the only adventure u get is waiting for something to happen...university clubs,always suck cause mostly run by medic students who have nothing in mond but to study,study and STUDY coz at the end of the day,you fail its BYE BYE!!
Empty board with no pics.
Ian : Don't take my pic.You take you pay....(Sky : Opps,too bad...)

Mich proud that SOMETHING is up on the board besides the huge wooden words..lolz
Noobs who tried to steal our board coz theirs was boring and empty...
Tjunhoe applyin his marketing skills to work when recruiting Juniors to the club.
TH : Be a member and go for 2 events free..2 wor...you don't want meh??

Yea,his face not very convincing i know :P
Because we had to skip lunch to man the booth,this is the result from extreme hunger when we had to jaga booth (though i'm not sure from what as there's nothing to steal except pictures and pens...) and from applying forceful-marketing skills (which most of us lack coz we're medic students unelss we are suppose to sell oursleves..then again) and chasing known juniors and dragging them to the booth to pen their names down...

2)Cheer leading...yupz,i know i mentioned it earlier but..didn't post up pics coz was lazy :P
The night before the big day,Mich and i attempted to meditate to be at peace...
Just us gals goofing around for the fun of it.Yes,mich was the only one who could split..
Sexy versus cutie..both equally hot.Guys who want their names and number,leave me a note on the C-Box and i'l get back to ya asap :) oh yea,their both single :P *runs for cover from both*
I love hugging this adorable walking doll.She's extremely,beyond doubt the cutest gal i know :) me love me chipiemunkie sister!!!
*squeak,squeak*
My darts babe partner who's also quite a hottie and alil notty *smacks her ass*
hehe...sorry,she's taken :P
love her to bits too!!

3)Then there was Yeen's surprise birthday.Right after our exams,we had a shopping mad rush to get her a present and hunt for mask as it was a Masquerade.Took the time to do alil shopping of my own with some gals and made amazing discoveries.Midvalley is crap now.New shipping heaven : PYRAMID!! haha,in particular the Asian Avenue :P yes,i know its all LaLa clothes.But thats cause you never look hard enough.THERE ARE Great bargains there for unbelievable prices (plus,who couldn't love them when i had qianhui to bargain for me..teehee,me love me mummy qianie)
So after all that shopping and walking....came the big D-Day of surprise..
On that day,gathered at Alyie's place to get ready (i love her house...so COZY!!!hehe)
Alyie and chloe getting ready....I was done so i had NBTD but...snap snap snap.. *grinz*

Chloe with her mask..so cute right?? *squeeze hugs her*
Our masks.Clockwise from top right : Alyies, Qianhui, Chloe, Mine....

Alyie,Mich and I goofing in the toilet...shaky hands :P
They were playing really sad,suicidal songs in the toilet.Very discouraging if ur hiding there and planning to suicide coz the song actually prompts you to do it even more...
While waiting for the birthday girl,everyone was warming up their camera so...why not ?:)

Ah liang looking *ahem*..gals,leave ur number in the c-box :P
The babes...waiting for the princess of the hour
A somewhat family portrait :) *ignore my fat legs..its hideous i know,i'm working on it*
Devan,my notty son who wants another mummy.Me so sad..huhu,but still sayang him.Sigh...

Yes,the famous sales man from the earlier pics.My noble steed :) hehe...and me babes' darling.
Mummy Aveena...Need i say more or does the pic speak nothing at all? luf u!!I love her mask.so kwel!!
Darling Dajie!So sexy that night...*woof whistle* Her mask is the coolest coz its got 2 colours..jealousnya!!
Who kenot love this wacky darling who makes life hard to live without without laughing for a second.Sexy also right ?*grinz*
Orientation for M108 family portrait :) more of less since some of the members were missing *hint,hint to yenyen*
With the IMU babes since sem1.Huggies!!!!
One of the very few batch geniuses..feel so small just sitting beside him >_<
Captain of M107 cheer squad :) love this babe too (Note : Not the same love as her boiboi so,FVZ don't misunderstand yah ) ALSO my brokeback movie partner *winkz*
PM of Negara SohSiLing...hehe..
Emo JoJo..not so emo that day.Wonder why though..hehe..
(I still want my chocolates...nice JoJo)
Me darling Tissy...huggies!!!So pretty rite :)
And finally a pic with lio...i mean yenyen :) *hehe,love ya gurl*
And after a MUCH log wait for the princess of the day to be free....
We were actually on the way to Euphoria ledi when we managed to snag her away from the impending paparazi's to be.. Conned into thinking its just the few of us gals going to Euphoria for her birthday...lolz..
She's the on in BROWN!!!

There's still more to come but i'm lazy to wait for it to load...Will put it up when I'm not so lazy later la...Mau hibernate now..

Kuantan!!!!

How to save a life

2008-11-26T18:30:00.002+08:00

We did this song today for our humanities class..How it changed my view of myself and the people around me now. I took things for granted so many times..
The lyrics says everything....

Lyrics to How To Save A Life :
Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came

CHORUS:
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

CHORUS:
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

CHORUS:
Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Think bout it, ponder over the lyrics properly.If you have the time,go watch the video clip closely. And then, think about those around you...
Have you saved a life ?
Or did you lose one?

To hell with you!

2008-11-25T18:36:00.003+08:00

I AM JUST PISSED AND CURSEDLY FRUSTRATED AT SOME PEOPLE WHO JUST DON'T WANT TO BE AS RESPONSIBLE AS THEY SHOULD,WHO KNOW THEY HAVE CERTAIN OBLIGATIONS TO FULFILL YET ACT WORST THAN A 4 YEAR OLD WHO CLUTTERS THEIR TOYS ON THE FLOOR.
JUST CAUSE YOU DON'T CARE,DOESN'T MEAN I DON'T EITHER. IF YOU WANT TO SINK AND DIE, DO IT ALONE AND DON'T DRAG ME WITH YOU.
BETTER YET,IF YOU REALLY WANT TO SINK AND DIE,LET ME KNOW AND I'L GLADLY DO IT FOR YOU,SLOWLY AND PAINFULLY!!!!

And people wonder why i'm so fierce.Can you not be if u were in my shoes?Don't give the crap you'l take it on with the sunshine and rainbows,that you see nothing wrong.Just cause ur on the other side of the banks and I'm not,doens't mean I'm wrong to react however way I react.

my 'light' at the end of the tunnel

2008-11-17T16:06:00.004+08:00

Just when I thought I'd see the light at the end of my long gloomy tunnel....
When I thought I'd be free...
I find a 100 ft waterfall with killer force turbulance dragging me under to crush me to the bone and die!!
Then the big question comes rolling in...
WHY ME!!!!
Sometimes I feel like I'm some sort of facade.Some joke meant to entertain ppl like The Truman Show.Somewhere there's a whole bunch of ppl who just love to pull the irony curtain on me when I thought things could get better just to add drama in my life,working onset when things get dull to pull the best stun they can on me then laugh their asses off at my reaction or how funny the ironic situation looks.Or maybe someone just wants to prank me by playing this whole scene up then jump out from the back and shout 'GOTCHA SUCKER!!'...
*waits for the idiot to jump out with a knife in tow to slice that idiots throat*
*waiting*
*waiting*
*no show*...... >_<
Or the Big guy up there just got bored from this job and decided to play some pranks on some lucky souls (Blasphemy i know..soryy)aka ME.I know I whine alot and complaine alot to You but just cause I do that,doesn't mean I want You to do THIS!!!
And I'm only answered by a distant rolling thunder that sounds like someone's laughing their heads off at this comedic scene,gleefully rubbing their hands together to see what the next scene unfolds.
And ppl ask me why I cant stand some ppl.Why do they want to push me to accept things I cant accept?Can you push Osama to reveal himself for the betterment of himself and the whole world so that Americans can sleep in peace?Or better yet,can you persuade the BN to let the Opposition to walk over and just take over the nation just like that?
I feel like I have this gene in me that if I placed it on the DNA reader would probably read 'CURSED' gene.Cause I always feel cursed.The things I pray would not happen ALWAYS HAPPEN!!! And when i pray for things to happen,they don't.WHY DO THINGS NOT GO THE WAY I WANT THEM TOO!!!Who in this entire rock could be as 'blessed' as me to receive all this 'abundant' blessings in disguise.I'm being frankly sacrastic and just really bitchy now cause I'm just stuck with such misfortunes that LOVES to follow me everywhere like a shadow and spring STOOPID surprises like this.
And she says 'We're all special'.
I feel special alright.Special enough to always be stuck in such rut.
Gawd,I hope this doesn't follow to sem5 or I'l be on a killing spree.I don't care if its evident bout how I feel.I carry them on my sleeves.Least I'm not hypocritical like some to hide them under my ass and pretend everythings OK when they are NOT!Hate me,I don't care.I hate you anyways.

GAH!!!!

I need sleep and more soapy drama's to make me go the opposite end of my emotional spectrum.
~Tears are words from the Heart that can't be Spoken~

CHARITY JUMP!!!

2008-11-08T22:28:00.003+08:00

hey everyone....

just so u know,jennifer from warwick uni needs financial help in order to raise funds far a charity jump she's gonna be doing sometime next year.
sorry i cant advertise much bout it ( sorry jen >_< ,thats why i'm not in advertising.hehe...) but for more info,click here!!!! and read all bout it there kay...
while your there,be a kind soul and send in some donations for her cause.She deserves every support she can get,not just for her and her partner but also,for the charity behind it that their gonna support.
if we can do something like them,let us help in whatever little way we can.
the link is also on the right column under COOL SITES!!
let us also keep them in our prayers,that they may reach their target and have a safe and fun jump (i'm jealous coz she gets to sky dive...gah!!!).

Thanks guys and gals..and God bless!!!

sorry,nothing to blog bout except...
EXAMS!!!!!

air topic fineto~~~

2008-10-26T23:51:00.002+08:00

Yes,the great Sky has completed her wretched air topic out of sheer determination to not leave work till the last minute.And also because on the day we're suppose to submit that piece of crap,we have exams so don't think i can plunder through the work load without making sure my will has been finalized *winkz to those who gets my drift*

After one whole day of shuffling through all that crap from the sites quoted to resource from (to those who have yet to do so,PLEASE don't waste ur time just printing everything.What you need barely reaches 2 pages long if u squeeze it all into font size 10,Times and double page it,TRUST ME!! Just take the paragraphs that is required and for that,refer to that paper that IMU graciously printed for us,one of the few gracious things they do as opposed to the list they DON"T do for us which runs probably at this rate,round the world thrice??) i finally managed to crap my way through Kidney Transplant and sent it on its way to some poor lecturer who will probably have their heads spinning from my non-comprehandable summary, or giving them the every excuse to give me a C- or lower cause they can probably tell it was done just for the sake of getting it over and done with.

Dunno,Don't care!!!

All i care bout is ITS DONE!!!
*dance dance*

Now,me can study in peace and well,just aim to finish my notes one time round,at least.

Waiting for C2O to call me with my new player...GAH!!!! its been 4 months already since they held my player and constantly telling me that my new player is 'On the way".

Yea,yea...from where?? Timbaktoo??!!!

Supposedly,the new player arrives faster than the previous (there's a whole long and boring yet frustrating story behind it that i'm lazy to blog bout now). Maybe it'l arrived faster since it'l come before the end of the year as oppose to the previous one which will probably come next year thats why they say its faster.Sigh...

And i was a fan of Creative products.Think my ratings for it just dropped by 10 already.And its continuing to do so until i get my new player!!!!

Sigh again...

Still feeling emo....

Stoopid hormones...

~Currently listening to Rihanna's Take a Bow~
Adding to my emo-ness listening to that song.My player's been randoming on emo songs the entire day.

Why so cruel??!!!!!!

Oooooo....
Pretty fireworks just outside my window.
Great,thats gonna keep me awake the entire night and distracted from my work....
Before i forget..

HAPPY DEEPAVALI TO ALL ME INDIAN FRIENDS!!!!
:)

*sits at window to watch fireworks like the idiot i am*

Disappointment

2008-10-24T00:24:00.003+08:00

Just feeling purely disappointed at many things....
Yet can't pinpoint them...
Not happy bout many things..
Yet cant do anything bout it...

Disappointment is no stranger to me anymore,then again never was...
Life's full of disappointment for me,waiting at every corner to pounce on me like a hungry animal on its prey..
When can i ever not feel this wretched feeling again?

My Movie list...

2008-10-17T19:30:00.004+08:00

I always whined right before exams that i need to watch a whole list of movies to destress myself from all that heavy work yet somehow,once the exams are done with and my pens and notes have been stashed haphazardly under my bed to add to my dust collection,I tend to sway and forget bout my dream movie list (that constantly grows depending on my mood) until come the next exams and the beautiful cycle starts all over again.

So...
I decided to list out some of the movies I've been really keen to watch,and of course,yet to watch otherwise there's no point in having this pinning for it...

*drum roll*

1)Yes the title says it all.I'm a sucker for English romance plus a cool heroine in it.More likely to say,I'm a sucker for Jane Austen's work.I already own (illegally) a copy of her most prized work,Pride and Prejudice BBC version which is SOOO much better than the 2005 one and already that DVD has never ceased to run in my player when I'm bored and need idiot box entertainment.
I haven't even read the book yet cause I've yet to get a hold of a copy myself.Some fan of Jane Austen I am...
One of a kind :)

2)
Why 2 different posters?
Cause one was in 1995 and directed by Ang Lee while the latter is the BBC production that just recently aired in the US and consist of 3 parts (but apparently did not get that good a review cause the writer swayed alot from the original like the small sex scene in the beginning,so i read..)
Besides,since there's 2 production might as well watch both*grinz*
I still,and always have, love Mr Darcy from the 1995 one,Colin Firth...
GAH!!!
3)Yes,as corny as it may sound,I always had an ickling to watch this movie since there is that whole hoo-haa bout the gay theme in it.I'm more of curious than a fan of it to want to watch gay movies like this.
This I gotten the influence to watch from Michelle Lee :P (yes,I name thee...haha)

4)Again another movie recommended by dear Michelle Lee :) So she claims,its the best romantic movie ever to watch cause she cried due to its touching love story.
Yes,again I'm a bit of a sucker for love stories but heck,who isn't?
I maybe a sadist by speech and actions but i have my non-sadist moments too.After all,I'm Human!!!

6)The ever so famous "Romeo,oh Romeo,where for art thou?" line came from here :)
Always managed to catch snipets of it on Astro and I've been ikling to watch the entire thing cause its not the contriversial Shakespearean era with those funny puffed sleeves and dresses that sweeps the streets etc.The language used is the classical Shakespearean but with a twist of modern touch to it.Pwetty cool :P

6)
Heard that this was a really good movie from one of those bloggy reviews.Seems like a pretty touching story bout Alzheimer's Disease.Hrm...medically related movie :D
Very tearful too,something which goes with my mood on and off.Really don't mind since I need an excuse to give my tearducts a run once in awhile,just to make sure its functioning and my ducts are not blocked from atrophy :P

7)
Hehe,again another Jane Austen novel adaption.And because they always remake these kind of shows,again must watch both!! :) Only a fan of Jane's work can see eye to eye with me on this..

8) A cousin recommended this to me since I had this undying love for Disney's movies (Confession time again,I'm a sucker for Disney's classic). See,it even won an award for BEST PICTURE OF THE YEAR!! :) Looks nice,no?

9)
When it came out in 1998,there was also this big hoo-haa bout how good and how bad the movie was.Back then,I was kinda under-aged to see it so i never got to kill my curiosity bout what the big deal this movie was all bout.So,now that I'm of WAYYY legal age :) This is one of those movies that always slip my mind until I oneday happen to chance upon something that jogs my memory bout it.

10)
I saw this once when I was a kid somehow.I loved the garden scene and the music that played in the background.Can't remember much bout what the movie was about thats why i want to watch it again.Was spured to find this movie again when I chanced upon a collection album in Popular recently that had the exact same title but was obviously of different content.

Hrm,was sure I made it up to 10++ movies but my brain kinda lost track of it after awhile and with all that searching for the posters on the internet.Oh well,one things for sure,this post will be constantly updated when i remember what other movies there are that lingers at the back of my rusty and dusty brain that I always made a note to watch but as usual,FORGET.
Can't blame me for my brain's power slowing down though.Think i past the prime age where it was suppose to work optimumly and am now in that deteriorating phase.

Gonna read Eragon now *grinz*
Toodles!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
11) Found another movie while randomly browsing movies to watch sites and i found something that is just my kind,at least I'd like to think so...Couldn't resist it and now i'm aching to watch it that i'm desperately trying to download it...
Nostalgia alert!!!!!
Something that is close to my childhood but has been extended to make room for a new addition to its family....
TINKERBELL!!!!
WHEEE!!!!!!!
Cursing utorrent now cause its so hard to find a loader i can rely on...GAH!!!

Mid life crisis??

2008-10-17T01:11:00.003+08:00

Galy's lecture today made me wake up to something i probably never knew i was suffering from all this while...
MID LIFE CRISIS!!!
Why?
Signs and Symptoms of going through mid-life crisis includes :
A SUDDEN LOST OF INTEREST IN MANY THINGS OR LIFE!!!

The one time I choose to pay attention to his lecture proved to be the last I will ever hear cause I think i've been traumatized already.
I recalled a conversation I had with a friend a few weeks back regarding relationships.
A : What do u look for in a relationship?
Me : ......Nothing.I have no interest in attaining one at the moment,or from my current POV,ever!
A: Why la?
Me : Coz i'm not interested anymore?And I don't think it befits me at this point of time.Why u so kepo wan?
A: Just asking la...U seem so lost in life..like no aims at all.
Me: Just cause i don't aim for a relationship doesnt' mean I'm lost in life.I have other aims in life u know...
A: Do u think u've lost interest in life than?
Me : Sometimes,i feel like there's nothing to live for and its so mundane...
A: Then do something bout it...
Me : malas la...

The rest is all P&C la.
Its true,i have lost interest in alot of things in life.But i AM in denial that i'm undergoing mid-life crisis.For one,I still feel like i'm in my EARLY life,not MID life yet.Plus,i don't feel like i'm in such a crisis that the worlds gonna end soon on me or i get the temptation to run the blade through my wrist "Just to feel the adrenaline rush and know I'm alive".
Thankfully I can never reach that stage coz I thank God for the senses He instilled in me to NOT DO DRASTIC THINGS WITHOUT THINKING!!
My only remedy in chocolates,chocolates and more CHOCOLATES!! and sleep sleep sleep like a pig.

I'm so not gonna listen to Galy anymore incase he springs up more surprises for me and my wake up call on life.
Shall go emo in a corner bout my mid-life crisis now...

I'm suppose to be doing PBL now,but i'm so lazy to do it.
Use to diligently write and draw out everything and feel so proud of it cause its my hard work and knowing that its for my own reference when i study rather than print things out.
But this time round,I'm doing it lazy man style and just not bothered.And also resorting to sit infront of the faci so that my back's my shield while i doze off or make funny faces and pleading faces to the rest to hasten the discussion,and all the while,only opening my mouth and vibrating my vocal cords to state a single sentence of agreement or yawn or just plainly to breathe to stay alive.
I'm stoning in front of the laptop,typing sentences that don't quite make sense to me at all but I'm still gonna type it out and post it up.
Coz i'm bored,lazy,tired,lost,and just in a planet of my own...

Maybe its working part time thats draining me....
hrm...

PDA dilemma

2008-10-08T21:04:00.004+08:00

Can anyone recommend me a good PDA to look out for?
cause this poor soul is eyeing some since this poor soul is in REAL desperate need to own one cause this POOR SOUL NEEDS TO ORGANIZE HER TIME PROPERLY!!!
I got the tuition job i've been praying so hard for..
WHEE!!Praise the Lord!!
But,i feel bad cause they have to change their dates to suit my timing (for the entire month of October,I'm only going in 7 days!!! can u believe that?!! poor kids :( )
Taking things slow with them.Starting pays not too bad.Thought i will have to take longer to pay my FAMA loan for the cheer outfit but the first pay pays it all off in ONE GO!!
YESH!!
then after this can start eyeing Zhao's camera *huge cheesy grinz*
BUt but but....
I just realise i need a PDA most urgently as I suck at time management.Hence,I nearly screwed up my timings with the nice lady who had to rearrange everything for moi.I cant rely on manual diaries coz lets face it,I have quite a collection of empty diaries dating back to 1998 thats suppose to help me be more organize but ended up getting lost midyear through and only to be found when the year was coming to an end.
And partly from me being lazy to fill it in so that I can be less sloppy >_<

Nikon D90

2008-10-04T12:38:00.003+08:00

During a good friend's recent 21st birthday celebration,I was offered quite reasonable deal from another friend who was made the unofficial photographer for the event..

Nikon D90~~~ *sing song*isn't it a pretty?
hrm....
He offered it for RM 1900 ( i think,or was it RM 1700 ??! my memory serves me TERRIBLY!!)
Initially I was doubtful yet tempted by the offer.
Why?
Cause i was already eyeing Canon's (but its SO HEAVULY PRICED!!! huhu!!) or Nikon D40 or D50. All noobs camera's for me.
The friend was selling it (complete but without extension lens ) as he wanted to invest in a better and more pro camera,wanting to 'take his skills to new heights' I'm guessing.
As if fate wanted be to mean to me for putting the offer on hold as i wanted to do some light reading on this model since I've always been reading on Canon's or the D40 or D50 model.That following week,The Star's Tech Tuesday section FEATURED the exact same camera!!!
GAH!!!
Saw the price and I felt like throwing myself at the on going cars as the First hand price was bout RM 4000 bucks!! >_<>
sniff,sniff...
And the reviews are WAYYYYY BETTER than the D40 or D50.
ME LIKEY!!!

No wonder I never saw an interest in Business as I would ensure its failure probably before the launch of it.

But getting it is the least of my problems...
NEED MOONEY!!!
DOUBLE GAH!!!
like really REALLY need the moola...
Been pinning my luck on the English Tuition near my house (and still keeping my fingers cross bout it)..
NEED A PART TIME JOB IF I WANT TO GET ME CAMERA!!!
huhu...
Anyone willing to help me??
Must be an honest work,no tricks or I will personally KILL YOU!!
pretty pretty please!!
I do not believe in resorting to FAMA loan because this is something i want to claim as my OWN property and I want to feel proud of it by working my ass of for it.Oherwise,there is no glory and pride in getting my hands on it.Just like how I want to save hard for other things i pinning for (see my wish list?? Its still building up..hehe).Depending on FAMA loan to me shows how pitiful and dependent I am on my parents for everything,expecting them to get everything for me like some spoilt brat.Plus,knowing the price of such wanted items like this and just stand there with open hands and waiting for the money to drop on my hands at the slight request from me when I want it feels degrading,like its WORST than a begger who sits there to beg for a living whereas I'm asking for luxury. Not to mention,now that resession's coming,I just don't think its right to ask for such an amount.As it is,I'm actually hoping for part time jobs to pay my 'loan' back for last months expenses (the cheer outfit cause quite a BOMB!!). And since I have worked before,I know how hard it is to earn money yet how easy it is to spend all that hard earn money in just a blink of an eye.
Even if i have to resort to FAMA,I'm insisten on paying back the amount I borrowed (even if it means no outside meals and having to 'tie my stomach',which translate to Ikat Perut).

Praying he hasn't found a buyer by the time i get the money...
*prays really really hard now*
Don't want to promise him anything either cause after kenot pay then kesian him if he found a better buyer who can already pay upfront everything..

Sigh...its true what they say..
Money makes the world go round,Yet Money is also the source of all evil.

AVG = anti-venting-geramness

2008-09-22T18:40:00.002+08:00

i'm officially pissed at /hate AVG in my computer..
its freaking driving me crazy with endless problems.
first,lost the a bin file to keep the updates..
NOW...
IT WLDN EVEN UPDATE!!
GAH!!!
if my computer gets virus attack i'm gonna sue AVG Co for horrible service.
been busy searching for help online from forums with the same probs but its of no help...
and when i found the quick fix,it last till i turn off my comp and restart it the next time.....

i miss kapersky programme so much..why did they have to put a price on it????
hence the reason i haven updated till now coz i'm alil afraid to go online to download stuffs without any anti virus running in the back..huhu..

even a walk in Lowyat could not soothe me (then again,its probably cause when i walk in the computer section,it reminds me of AVG) and every machinery there somehow has the word "VIRUS" stuck on it..in my POV..
i saw some really cool new gadgets there >_< wanna go back and play with it....

of cheer practice to farewell to pets!!

2008-09-16T00:23:00.004+08:00

cough cough..
first and foremost...
SOWEE!!! been too tired to update blog recently coz :
1) cheer practice drains the soul out of me..and i thought i sold my soul to Prasad last year for debate...its been draining me cause no matter how many times we practice,there are always some who never seem to do it right and we all end up doing the routines AGAIN AND AGAIN!!! such a waste of energy and time lo when it could be used to better things like perfecting stunts and more rest so that we're more refresh instead of walking zombies.i can understand the frustration peiwen and chloe (me dear chlowey-dovey-wovey who is so stressed to the bones) cause i myself get pretty frustrated that at times i feel like wranggling those who make the same silly mistakes again and again or forget some steps.HELLO!!! cheer competition this friday!!
for all that time and energy and money put into cheer,i am really pinning for a medal.atleast SILVER,if its a Gold,its like a true blessing.i'm really rooting for cheer coz admittingly,i truly enjoy dancing and i find it fun.but at the rate we're going,its starting to feel like a drag to even drag myself to cheer practice and repeat routines that should already be so perfect we could do it in our sleep or our eyes close.
2) need to catch up on studies alil..dun want to fall to far behind
3)whatever free time i get,its usually booked by the most important activity ever....SLEEP!!!! coz i live to sleep (and eat too)....sounds odd though..
maybe shd rephase it as I LOVE TO SLEEP!!!
the puppy's so cute...
*jump jump*
See...my schedule is PACKED!!! well least till 19th of this month la...

4) Bro's on the comp everytime i get home from cheer practice and he doens't get off till AFTER i fall aslp waiting for him to finish.he'l only bugde if i pester him too or tell him i've got work to do and WEALLY need the comp.
5) by the time i get onto the comp,i cant think of what to blog bout hence,cant update :P
but since i've been pestered too..guess i'll just leave aimless words to fill the space.

to a dear friend (and pesky one) from college who is already off to Nottingham UK..i bid thee..
FAREWELL BRIAN!!!
(psst...i just realised that when i respell ur name,it comes out as BRAIN!! haha..as in brainy-ack..so like u lor)
the monyet himself..last makan session with him and his acting like a clown..ish..
took the chance to also meet up with other college friends, Jenny and Wanlin :)

couldn't see u off coz i had cheer practice but rest assured,the moment my watch struck 8.15 pm,I would have let off great bangs of fireworks if the goverment let me :P
just kidding..
i could only celebrate with Ramli's burger coz i didn't have time.will do so after cheer competition kayz :)
good luck and may u find hot chicks there like u sometimes wished u could find :P hehe..
The new Happy Gay couple..so loving..haha.
kidding!!!

came back from cheer practice a few days ago and found this cute lil thing in my garden...
i give thee...
FROGGY PRINCE!!!
but,no i am NOT gonna kiss him..incase he turns out to be an even uglier prince.
my new pet who hides in my garden...think he has a sibling too coz i see 2 of them everytime...
what to do..
no puppy to keep so just grab any animal that walks my path as my pet..except Donkeys (inside joke)

lazy to blog more...sorry..
TATA!!!!

lost

2008-09-08T23:25:00.002+08:00

no,its not lost as in the AXN LOST..

its more of....
the feeling of being lost when you have no idea what to choose,or what to do..
you have your choices laid out for u (or in some cases,non at all)
and u just stare at them blankly...
wondering which to pick,where to go...
what the next step should be..
but at the same time..
life is like a game of
chess!!
anticipate your opponents move while taking the risk as you move.
or if your smart enough,con your opponent into doing what you want them to do and beat them to death in their own game.
my opponent : life

with all my time spent pondering on my puny existence,i realized I don't really know who i am.
i don't really know what i like,
what i want..
i have even lost track of my so called 'goals' in life.
and then i pondered more on why it was so...
and i realized,it all started with being who i want ppl to see me as.and at times,they played a role in making me who i am now.take an incident today for example,when after track and field training (more like baking in the sun) my schedule was all back tracked and i kinda took it out on my mum.i poured out my frustrations of being back tracking on time all because i was assured that i would be back on time which was just a lie.why?
because there exist a group of ppl who are ambitions to win everything, dragging the entire team with them not realising that we are all humans with our own individual capability.no 2 ppl are alike in anything as much as they claime they are.
i hate having my schedule rescheduled,especially when its not necessary and could have been avoided.
my actions had a cascading effect,mostly on my mum.
she waited for me for lunch,ended up eating late with me and i felt bad for it coz eventhough she could have eaten earlier,she waited despite knowing she had breakfast earlier than me before going for her morning jogs . i never like to make ppl wait for me,neither do i like ppl waiting for me.after gobbling lunch like a turkey,had to push her to rush me back to uni to help my junior with osce.
while in the car,she said something that started this ingenius thought :
Don't let ppl push you around.Either you push them,or put ur foot down and tell them to bugger off.In the end,ask yourself what do u get out of doing things for ppl.
it sounds selfish,but i felt that in that particular situation,it fitted like the last piece of a jigsaw.i've been letting ppl push me around,telling me what to do,when and where to go.so much that,without it,i feel like i'm a wondering sheep with no purpose.i've lost track of my life.

how much are u worth?

2008-08-27T20:14:00.004+08:00

how does one measures another's worth?
is it like gold,the smallest bit counts ever so much?
or is it like....

a feather?
not showing how much it weighs for one of its own unless measured in an enormous bundle?
the story of Anubis weighing the dead's heart against the feather on the Scale of Truth (one of its many known names) has always made me wondered bout how a person's worth is measured.
when i hear of stories of ppl getting auctioned off at a price,i cant help but wonder if that person's really worth what they have been paid for...
or the pays that one receives every month...

how does one measures another's worth?
then i begin to wonder...
how much AM I worth?
AM i worth it?

2008-08-27T17:44:00.002+08:00

a famous poet once wrote:
life is like a stage
set for the fools

another :
life is like a burning candle
a gentle wind
and gone is its light

the rainy weather has taken its toll on me again.the gloomy weather adds to the gloomy me,the stage has been set for everything to take place,and the actors and actress have their part to play.

Jie came on thrusday night and left on Monday afternoon.felt like only yesterday she was here and left.time couldn't be any cruel.though she spent most of her time with her darling (yes,i penalized you for that) but i guess,deep inside she deserves just as much after all the shiat she's been through with the she-devil in Kuantan GH and all that came in its neatly wrapped package.
speaking of which,i have my own she/he-devils to face here too.
i miss her again.cant wait for her to come back in october.
must finish studying by then so that i can spend time with her and discuss cases with her :)
think i quite enjoy discussing cases with her.makes me put into use all that i studied,minus the point when i get reprimanded for forgetting important things but thats the beauty of case discussion.
gives me more of the inspiration to excel in my work so that i'l make less mistakes (and less nagging from her)

after watching Pride and Prejudice(1995) for the umpteenth time,i realised that it very much lives quite where i am.i find that,unintentionally,each and everyone of us have a certain pride in built in us that we don't want to give up.and to shine in that pride,we do all we can,no matter what it takes,who we hurt,to let it shine and be known to others. its fine to be prideful of something that is of use,that is of some distinction that benefits not just oneself but to others or that is of truly one's own hardwork or labour.but to prideful that benefits no one except by means of hoping to elevate one's status in the eyes of others and gain favour is cruel and disgusting.
pride themself the most caring,the strongest,the wisest,the kindest....the list is endless..
and it can so evidently be seen in every person i come across.by that,i don't mean to exclude myself coz i admit i am prideful of one thing,that i value my opinion and judgement to be that which is the best in any given situation.but i know i make mistakes at times,and i'm not afraid to admit that that pride let to my fall in many areas.

i think i'm rambling nonsense.
my thoughts are jumbled up again and i blame the fever.

oddly,at the moment....
i feel trapped..

will read P&P again..

updates?!

2008-08-14T00:35:00.004+08:00

So,its that time of the year again..
of IMU cup events,and restarting uni seeing familiar faces for probably my last 2 semester before i wave goodbye to them as they travel to different parts of the world to manifest the IMU virus.
Of taking really dumb english test that made me feel like a high school standard ( i passed that mark almost 4 years ago le) then again,cannot be too over confident bout it.worst already that my sem is kicking of with such a bang,don't want to end it by having to sit through English Torture lessons...*cross fingers*
and also,the highly favourite chinese culture celebration...
THE HUNGRY GHOST FESTIVAL!!
such festivity as people put up those shrines to the hell god(s) and the wondering spirits who have been let loose to terrorize the world by demanding to be fed.
hence lay all the wasted food (which i believe usually end up feeding the stray animals and people think its 'them' that ate it) and the biggest event yet...
THE HUGE OPEN BURNING OF PAPER FIGURINES..
I LOVE HUGE BON-FIRES!!!
no,to put it short..
I LOVE FIRE!!!
guess thats why i'm a fire rabbit..
which reminds me again of another happier festival coming soon..
LANTERN FESTIVAL!!
WHEE!!!!
burning pretty candles and sticking them in pretty patterns,then just stand back and watch it all burn to the ground..
and at the same time,ultimately contribute to the haze production (though i believe the former contributes more since it happens EVERYWHERE!!!) and now that the Olympics are going on in Beijing,they shouldn't be scratching their heads much bout wondering where the haze came from coz on the opening night,i saw the HUGE MAIN CULPRIT!!!

THE BURNING TORCH!!! LOL..
yes,the torch that is suppose to burn through out the entire event and only to be put out when everyone has to say goodbye to the games,board their plans and be on their happy way home to their respective country and stop contributing to the already over-populated Beijing.and to those countries who are under terrorist threat,they'l be saying silent prayers and keeping their fingers crossed that they'l arrive safely and in one piece,not pieces or non at all..
so while it burns,imagine the amount of carbon it emits.plus,its running on kerosene oil if i'm not mistaken,or some oil which will make it produce more carbon...

Love is blind

2008-08-04T10:36:00.002+08:00

a few days ago i was out with some great college friends for a meet up over some teh-o-ice-limau and roti planta after a terrible screening of the 3D version of Journey to the Centre of the Earth.
somehow we got into the conversation of love.uncle,u know i'm talking bout ur 'love is blind'..haha

Uncle : Love is blind mah..
Me : And so?
Uncle : So.. (closes his eyes and throws his hands infront of him like a blind bat) when your in love,you become blind!!
Me : *sweat* So kenot see the person u love la?
Uncle : Oh course la.Sudah buta ledi mah
Me : And if u like that person u can see them la?
Uncle : Love is blind,LOVE IS BLIND!! not like is blind...
Me : *couldn't stop laughing since and still cant stop laughing till now*

Ed : thy love must have been really blinding to have such an effect..lol

mind u,the exact event could be slightly wrong but this was mostly what i remembered..haha..
so people,don't laugh at the blind people...
THEY ARE IN LOVE!!! according to the great uncle!!
Another great way to tell if your in love,from the wise words of uncle (identity has been concealed to avoid public attention)
if ur reading this...another inside joke for ya to remember..
PEPSI COLA BANG!!!
haha...

2008-08-04T01:32:00.005+08:00

a particular song has been playing in my head for days...i wondered why was it only that song,until i received an answer recently..see if ur a genius to guess this ever so popular song.

But you put on quite a show
Really had me goin
But now it's time to go
Curtain's finally closin
That was quite a show
Very entertainin
But it's over now (But it's over now)
Go on and take a bow

And dont tell me you're sorry
Cuz you're not
Baby when i know you're only sorry you got caught

Ooohhhhh
And the award for
The best liar goes to you
For makin me believe
That you could be Faithful
To me let's hear your speech
ooohhhhh!
How bout a round of applause
[hee he ha]
A standin ovation

maybe the lyrics are true,except the verse part coz its suppose to be the guy who is the ass not the girl.
Go google it if u dunno what the berjivvers it is.
Ed : apparently some ppl after reading this entry assumed it to be me talking bout them.HELLO PPL!!! please don't read this with ur eyes half open and ur brains half functioning.thats what causes all the misunderstandings in the world and hence political leaders making stupid mistakes and declaring useless wars.
i meant it for ME!!!aka muah!!! the idiot typing this to clear all the misunderstanding from ppl who assumed i'm kutuking them.aiyo please la!!isn't it evident??
1)i said the song was SUPPOSE to be about a guy being the ass not the girl - this means....in MY scenario,the role HAS BEEN REVERSED!! aka,the girl is the ass.i never typed the word SUPPOSED for fun when it doens take a genius to know that it IS ABOUT A GUY BEING THE ASS!! even a 4 year old can tell you that.
2) Why in the world did u think i omit the lyrics?? BECAUSE IT DOESN APPLY FOR A GIRL BEING THE ASS!! IF it was about a guy,of course i'll leave the verses there..sheesh!!!
best laughed i had so far after reading all the sms-es from ppl who thought i was blogging bout them..rofl

I'm in a sarcastic mood,i'm in my mood to shoot ppl down with my mean-selfish-heartless-emotionless-and-extremely-hurtful words.
stuck in a lurch
the one person i expected to get help from turn their backs on me.
still stuck in a lurch...
bite the blardy bullet and face the bull!!

the little mistakes i make in life avalanches into something so enormous for me to handle.and it snowballs too..what a lovely package to come in.
and i wonder how i survived till today...

when things don't go your way,what would u usually do?
drop to the ground and throw a tantrum like a kid until it goes ur way?
throw an iron fist about?
play dirty till its done how u want it?
me?
i'm just not bothered to care.not at this moment.not worth my second glance.
sweep it under a carpet?
i go modern,i vacuum it and throw it out!!

rotting..rotting..and still rotting away

2008-07-27T16:02:00.002+08:00

always thought rotting at home would be fun since i get to do absolutely NOTHING except stare at the ceiling and ...just stare away..
but looks like i was wrong.
boredness creeps in and after a few miliseconds,i start wishing i was somewhere doing something..anything except looking at the ceiling.
tried applying for countless volunteering jobs and part times but looks like no one wants someone who'l stay for less than a month..sniff,sniff....
feel like this is such a wasted holiday not doing anything.i'm not the kind to always sit around idling time away.want to go exploring,holidaying somewhere with ANYONE!! even if it was the worst person on earth or the the infamous current SIL of the PM (then again,i'l take that back..spoil my holiday only)
all the babes from Assunta are either having classes at the moment or working since they're back from UK with ubber long holiday period.strike 1.
college mates are also either having classes,back in their respective hometown or catching up with other friends who made plans long time ago...etc etc..strike 2.
uni mates are well...the same story rolls again though some are studying for resits..
to those doing resits,all the best!
gah....even soapy korean drama has failed me cause my tearducts have been running and they need a break.that or they are immune to all the crying already so no tears flowing.sigh..
BORED LIKE HELL!!!
gonne catch hold of some ppl and kidnap them on a vacation with me...*evil laugh*

Autumn Tale

2008-07-21T20:06:00.004+08:00

so much for me wanting to abstain from Korean soapy drama that requires one to use up half the tissue stock in the house.guess this is what desperation could eventually lead too.
after days of boredom setting in,i resorted to watch some Korean drama's off mysoju.out of the entire list of shows and hours reading all the lil bits bout the drama's, i eventually decided to watch....
Autumn Tale..or as some would have known is as Autumn in My Heart..
as corny as it sounds,i kinda like the show.gave me a good reason to give my tear ducts a run in case they were rusting.
i find that the typical 2 main characters surrounded by 2 extra side characters who are always pinning for the main couple but have to put up with being second and try their best to oust their competition theme applies alot in most korean drama's that are under Drama and Romance. Funny as it seems,i find myself relating it to my current life and find that it fits in alot of my social circle so basically saying,i have a Live- Korean- Drama going on around me. but,lets just pray i continue to stay as one of the super mini characters and not as the main or the other two. LOL..
watching such drama's sometimes frustrates me as much as it enlightens me with a few lessons. it frustrates me because
1) It takes so BLARDY LONG to stream the video
2) it gets more frust when it loads half way after leaving it to stream the entire day.
3) how blunt the main characters can be in not professing their feelings.then again,if they did,the show would have lasted at most 5 episodes and its The End
4) How ppl can be so selfish to always want things for themselves when they don't take a step back to see the entire pic.
5) How love can be easily be mistaken in some cases like the show, where it was thought of as Sibling love until they realised they weren't siblings
6) at the end of the show,I'l sit back and realize that guys like Tae-Shuk exist as a fiction of some romanting script writer and not reality. of course for one part of it,most guys nowadays come with DAMAGED LUNGS!! God knows if i can ever find a guy who is clean of that blardy sucker stick? I HATE SMOKERS!! coz i find them inconsiderate and a waste of sperm.if they want to die,they best way to do it is by jumping off KL tower or something that doesn involve other people's health or life. De-stress? let me help you by pushing u off the cliff since you need that adrenaline rush.they can already be compared to those Jihad fanatics,except they are more cowardly then them Jihads.if only these arses could walk around with a fish bowl over their head that allows them to smoke and RE-INHALE their disgusting smoke they breathe out instead of letting it join the atmosphere.if they die from lack of oxygen will be even better since they already are cutting their supply with each puff,saves the rest of the world of the shit these idiots will put them through.in away,they died blissfully too,smoking to death.
7) and from a medical students POV, who the HELL needs to to so many test that takes days just to see if your fractured hand is healed or not? and whats with all the bandages that makes it look like a cut on a hand that is supposedly broken already?medical student frusting over silly mistakes to create a movie...sorry

yet it thought me a few valuable lesson :
1) Appreciate life as it is. you'l never know when it'l be taken from you
2) never take people for granted as much as they love you and are willing to die for you.after all they have feelings too
3) don't separate your kids just caused they got switched at birth (God i hope that wldn happen to me)
4) dont' let your kid roam about freely in the hospital.who knows if they'l end up in the infant's room and switch the tags like that silly Joon-Soh.
5) Lying to save a relationship is like lying to urself in thinking it'l work. if they guy wants to leave,let him go la.it'l be worst when he finds our the truth anyways..sheesh.
6) sometimes,we have to make a tough call between choosing to make others happy or your own happiness.both ways, someone's gonna get hurt so decide who you want to sacrifice
7) as much as it may frustrate you, don't give up till its over and you know you've fought a good battle

erm,too lazy to type everything out.maybe i'l just make sure i keep what i have learned with me,not like i'm likely to forget since i always rewatch most of these kind of shows :P want to watch more soapy drama's since i'm so free and refuse to start studying for Sem 4..ITS TOO EARLY LE!!!
one of the best yet cheesiest lines from the show was when Tae-Shuk was trying to propose to Eun-Soh in the golf field.
Tae-Shuk : You just breathe, smile and live with me.

truth to be told,i thought initially that was pretty corny and stupid way to say it but after much thought, I thought it was pretty unique and romantic,if it was sincere :) sigh..wondering what funny lines guys can come up with if they don't want to go by the traditional on-their-knees- will-you-marry-me-and-show-the-ring..i'm actually wondering how i'l get proposed to now..
NAH!!! don't think anyone would want to propose to a she-devil like me..not unless they are drunk or have signed a pack with the devil himself to join him soon..
ROFL...

oh well,off to watch more soapy drama's now after i continue reading through and select one.
better go find more tissue papers just in case.Klenex company had better be proud of me for being one of their most frequent customer at the moment and supply me more tissue..
just kidding...

to those waiting for the K-session photos,sorry.my cams with my dad so cant load the pics just yet.will get it off his hands soon kayz..
love ya!!

was browsing through Facebooks and came across some photos that disturbed me greatly. people doing things i couldn't believe they'd do.how much some ppl have changed.was it my fault? why do i feel like i should take the blame for things ppl do?

2008-07-18T18:15:00.004+08:00

i'm bored.too lazy to blog.but just want to whine that i'm super-duper-ubber bored now that i'm done with attachment.the only thing i can see myself doing is rotting in front of the TV and in my bed..
having withdrawal syndrome now.not used to being super-duper-ubber free..
3 weeks of break is not enough for me because..
1st week = adaption phase
2nd week = rotting phase
3rd week = emo phase
then by the time comes 4th week = UNI STARTS!!
where got holiday???

i want to go somewhere for holiday....feel like going back to redang..or langkawi..or ANYWHERE!!!
my Schneider's been so faithful in keeping me company and listening to me croon.so has the Black Widow but i prefer schneider cause his lighter and my hubby no2.
just wondering how much longer can i keep myself entertained by those 2 before my fingers break.playing with schneider's quite a pain to my left fingers since i last played him and there's only so much songs that i like and want to pain-stalkingly learn to play...

updates as promised (and because i was bugged to do so)

2008-07-02T19:11:00.005+08:00

So,after all the slaving over the books and burning the midnight oil(which has already increased in price so burning it way past midnight also comes with a painful pinch to the pockets.then again,who uses oil lamps to study these days if your in the city unless dear TNB decides to help the oil companies earn alil boom by 'accidently' turning off the supply)

I'm finally free..temporarily.
Atleast till Friday 10 am of course..or later.but definitely before 12 midnight that fateful day.so much for Independence Day..
So exams came and went.surprisingly,it was not as bad as i thought it was.then again,better not say it too soon till i know how many letters i receive on Friday (2 is bad luck,remember that!!)or is it 3 now?
First day of examination:
arrived early thinking i could cram alil more into my puny mushed up brain before the exams itself.Instead,i got treated to a little bit of Romeo and Juliet scene,first class view of it too.not bad,for something to help me 'relax and unwind' before my exams although that was NOT what i wanted to watch.definitely not the "I die you die' scene but i'l just leave it at that and let your imagination run wild.To those who heard bout it,you know what i'm referring too la ;)
Second day and third day :
Getting sexiest Dr and SP's (simulated patients) is not a good thing to start off with.not when they are my VERY FIRST STATION! blardy female SP didn't tell me she was having sore mouth when i asked if there was anything else besides the tiredness.who the hell can diagnosed she had Vit B12 def anaemia with just blardy tiredness??
BUT BUT BUT!!!
when guys asked her,she obligingly gave them the answer.
and bad luck always has to come in rows when i saw her again in my stream the second day.least i was more prepared and didn't bother to think twice bout being nice to her.just went straight to the point bout what i wanted to know and didn't care if she tried to fire me back for being 'not nice'.better yet,for having the cheek to shoot back ' I don't know what i'm suppose to tell you' when i always ask if there's anything else.
they should have a law against sexiest people like this!!what more as SP's!!
Prior to that had to endure almost 3 hours of jail time which is A REAL DRAG!
but of course the entertainment of the moment was bout our favourite buddy and the radiant light that will shine on this buddy( Jo and kheelung knows who this is :P ) and of course,the one who speaks funny (this yeen knows)
Final day,day three:
nothing felt almost close to heaven then the feeling of the last announcement for the pencils and pens to be dropped (or in my case,flung out the window if there was one).Practical paper was fine minus that horrific graph that stunned EVERYONE.who the heck knew what it was?!!i bet the lecturers will have a laugh at my paper.especially Dr Thani when he reads my description of the pictures.thankfully,i read through Malaria and am darn proud to say that i am confident when answering the typical identify the ugly creature in the picture.
WHEE!!

so ends the examination with a bang..met up with a friend whom i felt i've been unkind too even till the last moment.

following day...
PAINTBALL WAR!!!
too bad my orange target wasnt' there..but it was termendously fun,especially with my babe Micky there to spice things up :) i love you micky!!and the entire gang - Yeen,Aly,Peihua,Mich,Yenyen(for the love bite,you sexy beast) Jo,Cheek,Tjunhoe(micky's sexy beast) and kheekhee!
and there was also keng xiong,keng seng and..the whole list is too long la!!
played capture your flag with unlimited life.
and for my medal of honour in that battle?
courtesy of Chan Li yen :P

This was 2 days after she gave me the 'love bite'
yes,notice the multiple petachie all over.
3 days later

it got alil purpura/ecchymosed..and alil jaundiced..process of healing ppl!!
doesn't it look colourful?
did i also mention that it actually grew??
think i'm harbouring a mutant!!
4days later..
yes,the jaundiced has spread so i'm officially partially jaundiced!
and it hurts when i walk.occasionally it made my right leg numb..
possible case of SVT!!(med ppl should know what this is..if not,YOU FAIL EOS!!!)
the last one reminded me of PedalPop rainbow ice cream..lol

my sexy leg currently with her love bite on it..
PS : PLEASE!! ignore that lipid filled thighs..

this is why lions cannot give love bites..sigh..(i still love you yenyen!!)
but after all that excitement,i'm still gamed for more paintball..
next stop..
MUDTREKKER!!!
suppose to go Sunway lagoon today but...
the curse of the red underwear struck..sigh..sucks being a girl sometimes yet it still rocks..
i'm contradicting myself.

oh yeah,and to celebrate our free from exams (i know,its messed up and super random here and there)
FINALLY WENT TO SKY/LUNA BAR..
sorry,i couldn't remember which was it :P
it was nice to sit in a great environment where it screams nothing but sit and relax.
and with a slight dose of alcohol,and a few crazy nuts like my favourite who has low tolerance for it and starts balberring nonsense.ok,she didn't reach that stage but it was almost there.just needed to dose her with shots and i'l hit home run.hehe..
yeen,i want pictures!!!
then on monday,went for 2 movies back to back with Jo,cheek,kheekhee and yeen (who bail out on the last movie)
the irony?
it all had ANGELINA JOLIE IN IT!!
haven figured out the movies?
geez,your slow...

get the picture now? (course,its cheating cause you already saw it..)
Wanted was really cool!!especially the 'swing the bullets' alot of nonsense that defies the laws of physics but hey,its what gets me pumping! jolie is hot though,for a pregnant women doing all that stunts when she was in her early pregnancy stages.
*salute salute*
i think they recycled some of her costumes from Mr&Mrs Smith and TombRaider though.noticed how the white tight shirt she wore looked AWFULLY familiar??
and kung fu panda was ironic yet pretty cute.and the lesson behind it felt really valuable somehow..
Its all in you..

during the exam preparing period,i happen to look out and see...
A SQUIRREL!!
and there was 2 of them!!
SO CUTE!!!
I'm King of the wall!!!
they made my day,just watching them chase each other in the garden..sigh..
ok,with all that updates,my petite fingers need a break cause i need to save them incase my worst nightmares come true this friday.
toodles!!

hrm,i forgot to blog bout my unfortunate shopping spree with micky..dang!
but out of that trip with micky,she told me something valuable that i owe her alot for.and the time spent gossiping and talking with you is always incredible.
thanks so much babes!I LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU MAX!!
no wonder your my mummy :) hehe..

to someone else...
i miss you
there's somethings that has been on my mind that i wish i could take you aside to talk about.

results results results results results results results results results results results results results

of exams and missing a certain someone

2008-06-15T19:58:00.005+08:00

down with one week left(exactly 1 week) and i'm still left with GI to cover.thought i could finish everything last week but all credits to the slacker in me...TADAA!!!

so now with the clock against me,i shall join the living zombies of IMU and masquerade the halls till the end of 26th of this month when the lord of zombies shall redeem us all of our misery and pain (well,partially,there's still part 2 of the zombie's chronicles) with ' Your time is up.Put ur pencils and pens down and we shall collect your papers (of doom!)'.
Thus,we can take a living breath once again only to have it sucked out again when we return on the 4th of July (yes,while the Americans celebrate Independence Day,we celebrate Doom's Day...thats life in cross continents).
Counting down.dunno to be happy or anxious and chewing the heads off my pens at this moment.obviously neither since i can post this up,unless i chew on the electrical cords and electrocute myself.LOL!!
God,just pls let me pass.All i want is a C and nothing less,nothing more.

++++++++++++

Jie left for kuantan this afternoon to start her houseman life in Kuantan Hospital.After all these years when she was in Seremban or BP,it never struck me how time really flew.maybe it was because she could still come back over the weekends.and we were both still studying,signifying we were still young.
but now,it just dawned on me..
last night was the last time we will probably sleep tog in our room.
in a blink of an eye,she'l be really gone.now with her working,she'l be too busy to talk to or see anymore.with me studying,time really has been so cruel.i know the next time i open my eyes,it'l be the night before she says her vows and be given off to another (though i already know who it is).and after that....
everything will be like those black and white photos of memories...life before is like watching it all on those old camera films..
this afternoon,when she was running around packing things last minute,it just hit me hard that i'l really TRULY MISS HER..
oddly,when she waved goodbye,i didn't really feel a thing.there was no tears,no sorrow as i watched her drove off...
maybe it was because i knew she would come back...
and came back she did,barely 10 minutes later...
not to say goodbye again..
BUT FOR HER BALRDY LABCOAT!!!!lol..
but still,...this time,it felt different..
because this time,i knew it was really goodbye..
as i walked down the stairs after her,i couldn't stop the tears from flowing silently as i watched her from behind making her way back to the car with her labcoat clutched carefully in her arms.
or as i stood behind her car,watching her drive off,for good this time,shielding my eyes and pretending it was the blazing sun that made me tear.
the next goodbye..will probably be even harder for me to handle.
Jie,if you ever see this,i know you'l be laughing hard bout it but..
I LOVE YOU JIE!!
already missing you,listening to you type furiously away on the comp to him,or ranting bout lil things you read off the net..talking loudly on the phone in the room as much as it annoyed me while i study..
though you nagged me countless times,and i hated you for that instant,i know you did it out of love(or cause you had ragging hormones at that particular time)
i wish my exams weren't so close to you leaving,i wanted to spend the night talking away with you cause i know the next chance will be hard to come by.
i just want to turn the clock back so that we can be those lil girls,playing in mum's room and in the garden,fighting over small things and saying hurtful things to each other yet at the end still hug and kiss and say " I love you".
you were always my inspiration despite our quarrels and bullying.my pillar of strength,support and just MY DEAR OLDER SISTER!!

the proudest moment with you(although i had to be dragged out of bed at such an ungodly hour to follow you there)Last CNY,our sibling photo:)

God bless You.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE (times infinite) YOU!!

mistakes

2008-06-10T21:37:00.003+08:00

I find that in most instances,i make the worst of judgements and bound myself in the worst of mistakes that sometimes can be quite unforgivable,to the party and to myself.
i'm not belittling myself or playing the humble me.
maybe its the exams that has gotten me reflect bout my actions,or the stress that makes me think otherwise.

One of the few mistakes i make is trusting the wrong people.Ppl whom i thought i could trust,gave my trust whole-heartedly (maybe thats my weakness,i let ppl too easily thinking everyone has no evil intentions) only to find,somehow later and MUCH too late that it was all a lie,beautifully fabricated screen-play starring the biggest fool of all = ME! I called these ppl friends,treated like one and build that ' special' bonds with them.but when i learn the truth bout them,the bond is like a feeble wooden bridge that will give way to the endless bottomless pit at the slightest wrong move or extra weight.am i being paranoid bout things,since i draw up these conclusions base on what i'm seeing on the surface?should i give this person a chance to explain things before really giving in to the urge of pushing them over KL tower or wrap my aching fingers around their necks and squeeze the living fats out of it?
i never learn from my mistakes cause of my folly.In the end,i realize that there are only a few,really small number of ppl i can fall back on and trust and know,they'l never treat me like how this hypocrites do.really thank God for them,for blessing me with them and them as well,that through all my follies they still stick with me.I just wish that at times,i'd never get them involved in my folly acts.that i'd be wiser and not be to quick to assume many things that appear not as they seemed.A wise saying goes " Don't jump into the water just cause its calm.You'l never know what lurks beneath."
these hypocrites who drive me insane when i see them,who make my blood boil and a sudden outburst of adrenaline to....do the worst i can do to them!!

i can say all i want,how much i hate this opportunistics.my blood will boil thinking about it.but when faced with the enemy,it all just shimmers away and fades into oblivion.and there i am,standing in front of those who make me want to wrangle their pathetic necks and save the world from them,smiling and treating them just like any other friends.and in the process,thinking...that maybe i was just wrong,and they'l do something to prove me wrong about them.giving them one more chance again.i'l walk away later,continuing that vicious cycle within me.and it goes on and on and on and ON!!!
if only i have the courage to tell them in their face how i feel bout them,demand an explanation or something!!rather that to continue being their lil pawn they know they can come running to when no one's there,when they need someone to step into that lil prefect trap of theirs.some idiot like me who'l listen to their wallowing pitiful stories and show them the emotions they wanted,then walk off and laugh at how easily that came.
I always attract the wrong kinda ppl and bring problems to others.
yet,i'm thankful to some of my friends who,after all the shiat i put them through,all the troubles and blunders that would have made anyone walk away and leave me in the lurch,i'm so thankful for some of you who still stick by me.though you point it out yet i never listen cause i'l be too full of myself or i want to stand by what i deem is right (which is usually wrong) you still stay.
you know who you are.i love you gals/guys so much for that.
THANKS PEEPS!!!
i'l try to learn,and be more open to you.most of all,i'l not drag you guys along with my folliness.
its a promise i'm trying to keep:)
big hugs to you peeps!!
LOVEY LOVEY LUF LUF YOU ALL!!
and to the hypocrites,i'l continue to be nice.but cross my line,and i'l make every living day a living nightmare for you!!try me if you dare and see what i can do..

in the midst of my boredness...

2008-06-09T00:13:00.002+08:00

I decided to cam whore for my new glasses...
except...
i'm not in the picture (unlike some ppl who HAD to cam whore with their new glasses...yes,i'm referring to some ppl but i shan't say who coz i want to live to sit for my EOS and receive my letter of repeat.haha)
introducing..
the old,faithful specs that has served me well for the past 3 years and is now finally bout to take its long awaited rest in the depths of my drawers,hidden and soon to be forgotten...and collect alot of dust:P
fully rimmed and reminds me so much of HP's,except that his was ROUND ROUND and mine is OVAL OVAL!!haha..can see the paint peeling from the bridge and the rims..hehe.shows how much i've been using them..
see,its even senget on one side coz i accidently sat on it once..i think.or was it i slept with it? cant remember.all i remember was one of the ear piece thingy was so bended that i was afraid it'l snap with the slightest mis-aligning.
and now,introducing...
the new specky that relieved my headache (but added more to my stress coz of power increase.if you forgot bout the headache,its a few post back..)
Half rimmed,colourless (so that there'l be no more paint peeling) but still alil more fragile than the previous so i've to be EXTRA careful (which is IMPOSSIBLE for me coz i'm freaking clumsy with anything and EVERYTHING!!) and its square..mum helped me pick it after my eye check.

see,not senget!! hehe...
and did i mention that it has UV protection?WHEE!!!
so officially,my power on the right has increased by 50 % making it 100 on the right and 25% on the left making it 125.
sigh,all that studying is making me blind..unfortunately,with the power increase,i still cant see the answers to making me the einstein of the century.
sniff,sniff...

and now,its back to more eye pains and power increasing..

of exams,music and total randomness

2008-06-06T01:37:00.003+08:00

after all the studying and cramming,i'm still behind schedule.

should be studying but i found that nothing was going in so decided to blog bout the absolute nothingness as always.

was watching Enchanted the other day on my player,it never struck me before the beauty of the show.an incorporation of all the Disney classics in a modern fairy tale.just watching it felt like i was watching all my favourite Disney cartoons in less than 2 hours rather than watching it all individually.
one part that always made me cry was the waltzing scene between Giselle and Robert.either it was the song that really gave out the emotions or the meaning behind the dance.and i so love the ending song with the credit roles.which constantly reminds me of my greatest wish : to sit and watch a Disney orchestra,encompassing ALL the favourites of classic and the newer ones.
maybe i should write to Alen Mecken as a suggestion.think it will be so cool and the ultimatum.will probably be one of the fanatics who watch every single concert.lol.thats how much i'm crazy bout orchestra-disney music:)
Waltzing scene..so romantic and sweet..yet so sad>_<

brought my player for repair the other day at low yat.left it with the technician to repair and few minutes later he called me back to say he couldn't fix it coz the server is down(something bout downloading the repair programme etc..wasn't really listening coz the bottom line was he didn't know how to fix it la)after a whole list of explaining how to DIY,he actually asked if the classics on my player were really classics( as in Chopin and Bach etc) and if i DID listen to him.apparently,it was quite a shock for him cause he rarely meets ppl who listen to classics.
is he for real? whats that to do with anything bout how to fix my player?
wondering if his really a technician or a scam cause the next question he asked was really odd.
Technician :How did you download them?
Me : Erm, u torrent?
Technician : Wah,not bad you know how to download them.not many ppl know how to use.
Me : *blank* oh.....?!
after more empty chats,he gave me his card and told me to call if there is any more probs.haven gotten round to it coz i'm pretty lazy to do alot of things at the moment (hello,look at the blog itself la).then again,dont' think i will call him at all.funny fella la.will take it straight to the service center in endah parade.

anyway,back to Enchanted.lol,see super random..
hooked onto the song from the waltzing scene.dunno why.maybe its the lyrics,or the serenading voice of Jon Mclauglin (his voice is so sexy like Micheal Buble,he even looks hot and sexy) or...its just me.i'm a sucker for good music (and thats good according to my taste not chart good etc...)
Check him out...
lost count of how many times i've heard the song ledi.its on repeat track:P listening to the song triggered alot of memories bout so many things.it didn't carry any sentimental value but it brought me to reminisce bout many things in my life.think this will be a great song to use for graduation video with lots of memory pictures of the entire 5 sems in imu(if i make is past EOS la) and i know for sure,it'l make a hell of a dance song for couples at balls.wonder if i'l ever get to dance to this song..lol..fat chance:D

You're in my arms
And all the world is gone
The music playing on
For only two
So close togehter

And when I'm with you
So close to feeling alive

A life goes by
Romantic dreams must die
So I bid mine goodbye
And never knew
So close was waiting
Waiting here with you
And now, forever, I know
All that I want is to hold you
So close

So close to reaching
That famous happy and
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
Now you're beside me
And look how far we've come
So far
We are
So close...

Oh, how could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now?

We're so close to reaching
That famous hapyp end
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
Let's go on dreaming
Though we know we are
So close
So close, and still
So far...

back to nerding.have to finish my work ledi if not i'l be lugging my entire shelf (not cupboard) to KK which definitely hits past the 15 kg mark.

Stoopid me!!

2008-06-04T19:18:00.001+08:00

Shoots!!
fooled around with my blog settings and accidently deleted everything...GAH!!!
now have to re-add everyone's links and re-edit!!
GRR!!!
me and my itchy fingers...
*kicks self really hard*

my questions have been answered!! seriously

2008-05-31T21:55:00.002+08:00

barely 24 hrs since my last post,ppl have been messaging me to go for check ups and advices on what to do bout the funny symptoms.
and hence,one of my problem has been solved.well,2 actually.
went for an eye check and discovered my power has increased.which lead to my constant headache due to eye strains and lack of good spacing judgement:P
haha,all cause my focus was out.
so,come wednesday,me will be collecting my new glasses.
YEAH!!
hopefully by then,my headaches and bruises will be gone and i can study in bliss and not feeling like tearing my eyeballs out from the pain.
and the world shall see a geeky me prancing around and hounding the corners.hehe...

yea,since thats only 2 of my problems solved,think there's still 1 problem left which is my GI problem.hrm..think its related??
haha!!

Kiss me?<--don't even think about it

2008-05-30T23:18:00.006+08:00

with barely a month to EOS,i've been told to look after myself yet again.
don't blame anyone,i always have the exam sickness curse.
now,i'm actually getting worried bout how bad its gotten.
the past few weeks have been,symptomatiful (something like colourful except i've been cropping up with lots of weird symptoms,any medical student care to diagnose?)
1)bloody stool,painful to pass.its more of constipation i think cause i find i have to strain at times.pretty graffical i know.at one point of time,i had this crazy notion that my menses is coming out the wrong end cause i screwed up my hormones with all the stressing:P
2)stiff shoulder on the right side especially in the mornings
3)pounding in the back of my head that comes when i study.feels like my heads gonna explode.panadol isn't working at all and neither is sleep.it comes especially at night when i'm studying and i find it really annoying.had another crazy thought of it being tumour after all the tumour lecture notes but then,i dun have any lost of sight or hearing,no weakness or losing of appetite.don't think i'm losing weight either,more like gaining since all i do is eat and sit down to study.sometimes it feels like my heads gonna collapse in instead(hurts even more for this)
erm,thats bout most of the odd symptoms i can remember happening at the moment.
4)then again,i think there is something wrong with my vision cause i'm having problems gouging space.i bruise myself alot recently because i 'think' i'm far from a door post or table but actually i'm so freaking near i smack right into it.my elbows are gonna get dislocated soon with all the banging into i get myself in.

less than 1 month away.everyone's contantly putting it up as a reminder in their blogs or facebook.sigh...
was watching one of my few favourite movies from high school,She's All That.Sixpence none the richer sang this song.got it stuck in my head ever since..
Rachel Leigh Cook is so cute!!haha...portrays such innocence she fits the role like a glove.

Kiss me out of the bearded barley
Nightly, beside the green, green grass
Swing, swing, swing the spinning step
You wear those shoes and I will wear that dress.

[Chorus:]
Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me

Kiss me down by the broken tree house
Swing me upon its hanging tire
Bring, bring, bring your flowered hat
We'll take the trail marked on your father's map

[Chorus (repeat)]

High school romance,sigh..seems so long ago and so legend-ish.
now comes uni life.no such thing as uni romance,not in med school atleast..
its either the MRS or DR title..
>_<

have a huge cravings for fireworks
and Baskin Robbins rainbow sherbet..

i shouldn't even be here blogging..
i should be STUDYING!!!!

2008-05-10T22:17:00.003+08:00

everyone says i have the gift of the gap (for some who don't speak it,it means i am a blardy chatterbox coz i can talk till the cows come home and go back out and repeat the cycle) begging to differ,i sometimes feel like it all plays by my mood,i find i do shut my gap at times.they also say i'm too open about what i think.
and thats my problem.my brain and my mouth are too separate entities.to put it short,i have 2 brains,one stuck in my head that is probably becoming a close resemblance to encephalopathy and the other is a small one hidden in my oral cavity that controls my mouth and probably some nerve fibers to my larynx.in short,again,i don't usually think before i speak.what goes in my head comes out from my mouth and sometimes,i feel like thats the worst of me.
true,some people say its good that i can talk alot and that i'm very open about my opinions.initially,i thought it was a blessing to be able to close akward silences and don't give to fartings about speaking my mind.i always thought it was a good thing to speak my mind after all,why preach about freedom of speech if i don't practice it right?
but like i said,thats where my problem lies.
i practice it too much to the extent that i REALLY don't think before i speak.and most of the time,it lands me in heaps of trouble.and i end up regretting what i say alot.i know that the things i say are hurtful, and harsh and sharp (i get that alot from comments ) and,i'm really trying hard to work on that.i've been trying to hold my tongue and process what i would love to say and what i should say before i exersice my vocal cords and jaw muscles.but again,it haunts me every now and then and i still revert back to my old habits.
one gift i wish i really have is the gift to turn back time.why should ppl be envious of me speaking my mind freely and having the gift of the gap when i find it a curse and torture?granted,sometimes i myself find it cool i have no qualms bout doing that but i guess,there is this guilt conscious part in me that kicks in VERY much later (and alittle too late for that matter)
and to add the cherry on the cake,i realise that my stoopid mistake could potentially cause a chain reaction involving people i never intend to get involved with or hurt unintentionally or give problems too to cut it short and sweet.
i'm trying really hard to change,but its hard.old habits don't die in a day.i'm thinking of listening to my player more so that i cant hear the world and i can keep my gap shut.or resorting to having food in my mouth more cause my next passion in life is food hence said,with it in my mouth,nothing else bothers me.
and the blunders i make,only adds worst to my guilt.i feel so bad for alot of things i've said and done.how i've taken some ppl for granted and literally treat them like dirt.
oddly enough,when i tried apologizing to some of those i've mistreated,they actually thought i was gonna commit suicide since it has been noted that before a person dies,they actually act out of the ordinary.
sadly ppl,i'm still very much alive and am here to continue my tormenting of your pityful soul *evil laugh*

so ends my post here.time to hit the books.

writers block

2008-03-27T16:53:00.003+08:00

sorry peeps..
me is having absolutely nothing to write about at the moment..
prob cause the only thing in my head now is..
MOCK OSCE!!
and pbl work to finish..
and hemato..
and cvs..
and respi..
and soon to come..
GI!!!
so..
a word of advice..
start dropping by once a month..
or in two months..
or three..
whatever la...
ZZZZ....

video's worth watchin

2008-03-09T23:24:00.003+08:00

in recent events of the election news,i found so darn good videos about how well our country was going to the dogs..check it out..its SOOOO TRUE!! and worth the watch and good laugh.
THANK GOD BN'S GOING DOWN!!
its time for them to stop having their heads in the clouds and turn in to reality check.
unfortunately,nothing can be done bout SIL.i'm willing to put all my saving accounts on this bet that his 'suprise' win was due to phantom votes that he paid RM200 each.
want proof?
check this link and there's your solid proof of the existence of the phantom voters our "DEAR" election commission chairman denies.on another thought,i wonder whats he gonna do bout the gallons of ink meant to 'prevent the phantom voters'..paint his enormous mansion gates with it?
phantom voters DO exist

for more cool videos,i've linked the site..its cool!

I'M SO FOR DAP!!
BYE BYE BN!! so much for your 'we have our loyal supporters'.look who's turn their back on you for all the shiat you've given..
and to samy..well,no matter where you hide, you've just earned the SCUM OF SOCIETY award.must have gotten his BEST birthday present ever..what a laugh..

current thoughts

2008-03-03T01:08:00.002+08:00

stressed..
scared..
stressed...
dying..
stress..
pressure..
MORE STRESS!!!

how much more can i take
how much longer can i hold on to sanity?

too much things to think bout..
too many things that eat into me and lingers like the air
like the stench of death

in huge,HUGE trouble and under enormous pressure to perform better now..

sometimes,i just want to drop everything and give up
hide in my refuge place and hug or cry myself till i feel better
or
cry on someone's shoulders until i go blind
or just hug someone i can trust in silence
and let my actions speak for itself
while i let my frustrations pour like the rain
i need you to listen to me...
where are you when i need you?

21st birthday

2008-02-29T22:54:00.002+08:00

hrm..
never thought i see the year i dread more than ever
2008
why?
its only the beginning of the year,how bad can it get?
for me..
SUPER!!
why?
all cause of this rave about hitting the big 21
honestly,i don't see the biggie in celebrating the 21st burfday of your life
to me,its just like any other year of birthdays.
it marks the fact that ur one year older and NOT YOUNGER(WHO WANTS TO CELEBRATE THAT!!!!)
sure,i'm legal to vote,legal to drink etc..
so what?
i'm OLD!!!
u get your wings (what wings???!!)
its really not that big of a deal..
why all the hype!!
i really have no intention of celebrating..
its JUST ANOTHER YEAR!
sheesh..
for that fact,since its MY birthday,don't i have the right to say if i want to make it big or small?
and since i want it small ( or for that fact,totally obliterated...don't ask me why,i'm just not from the norm crowd so i see things differently..SUE ME!!) its should go as how i want it.
rite RIGHT??!!
can they just leave me alone and not harp bout how i want to celebrate it?
such selective answering method..like some machinery where the wrong input will result in ERROR!!PLEASE TRY AGAIN!!
sigh..
looks like i have to come up with something to keep me busy towards April..
so that i can escape and say i'm busy so no time to celebrate
and somehow,exams not an excuse..
DIE!!
i'm a sadist,what are you gonna do bout it?
i have rights to what i want, you cant do nothing bout it
and right now,my rights is to not make my 21st birthday such a big a deal..
read somewhere bout how rich brats splash MILLIONS on their mingy 21st..
MILLIONS!!
imagine how much it could have contributed to the health departments
the African Help Org
AIDS organization..
charities
sigh...how selfish the human race can be..
i'm still not seeing the point of making my 21st a hype..
infact, call me crazy or freak but i never really liked celebrating my birthday,but i don't mind celebrating other ppl's birthday.
i find it a drag to wake up on birthday day
its like the worst day of my life or something..
and being asked the same question every other year
so,what are you gonna do on your birthday?
what do you want to do?

how bout sleep and just pretend its not my birthday??
i'm not a birthday person..
haha...funny right?
but i get really excited for other people's birthday..
think i have some psychiatry disorder..
i call it..
the I-Don't-Want-To-Celebrate-My-Birthday Syndrome..
*grinz*

someone please save me before i'm forced to resort to drastic measures....

2008-02-28T20:46:00.003+08:00

hrm..after blog surfing for awhile i noticed something..
whats with everyone and that song
'teardrops on my guitar?'
its like a sudden craze that has swept the population,esp gals..
seriously,
why do we allow ourselves to mop bout some guy on a song?
it makes us sound so..
weak..
sure music brings out the emotions, the meaning behind everything etc etc
true,the song is nice
and i gotta admit
it somewhat speaks to me about a certain area in my life that i want to take to the grave with me
but..being me,
i will not allow myself to be subjected to such misery of emotions.
no no no..
me is gonna put it all behind and face what i really want
to graduate and make it big in life as a trauma specialist
to only have work on my mind and nothing more...
ok, i lied.
there will be times when i wanna go splurge alil..
but nothing else..
wouldn't let the mistakes i made in the past pull me down like it did

exams drawing nearer..
i wonder if i'm prepared as i think i am
then again
i know i'm not,cause i haven finish studying!!!
*scream*
now that Jie is graduating (congrats btw,am so BLARDY proud of you!!)
i'm starting to wonder if i'l ever reach that stage..
to graduate and be relived my studying days are over
and to welcome the killer-stress of life = WORK!!
to throw my notes away or give the subjects i hate back to my lecturers (like me geography,don't ask me where this and that is..I REALLY DUNNO!! go google it up)
am just about reaching the tip of the knife already..

I wonder if he knows his all i think about at night..
His the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
His the song in the car i keep singing
I don't know why i do...

That song is starting to get into my head and wouldn't leave me..

missing juju still..
sniff,sniff..
no one can replace her..not even close..
I MISS YOU!!!
huhu...
its so true what some friends told me
so ppl are really hard to replace,no matter how much we try to fill that space with someone else
its just not the same....
i'm sorry...
its just not the same talking to some people..
though i really appreciate it
but,its just a void space that can't be filled by another shoe
but i'm grateful they tried..
really i am..

flowers

2008-02-25T21:44:00.004+08:00

someone once asked
'what is your favourite flower?'
i pondered on it for quite sometime...
while walking in the florist shops,i saw rows of roses..
red,pink,yellow..
but two flowes struck out the most that captured my attention and i found myself loving
it had something...special about it
an air of pure and innocence..
not my kind
but still,i was really drawn to it so much
anything that had it was..
just plain beautiful in my sight
always portrayed as innocent beauty
pretty no?

i know,its WHITE ROSES!!
they give this in funerals..
but ever stop to wonder.
why do they give it in funerals?
why give something so pure,innocent and beautiful to someone who has passed?
does it always have to signify death?
isn't that a harsh sentence to somethings as beautiful as this?
what more if it went side by side with the lilies..
a sight to behold..
sigh..
and guys always give red roses..
so boring...
don't ask me why i suddenly blog bout flowers..
had no intention on blogging today but while doing pbl,
i got bored and that statement suddenly popped in my head..
to that friend,if your reading this
now you know what favourite flowers are
:)

i need to talk to you...
faster get your line up..
i'l go crazy if i don't hear from you soon..

need to study and do pbl now.
EXAMS!!!!